Pretty excited to have courtside seats for tonight's UConn/Rutgers game. Hoping Jeremy Lamb has a big game so I can yell, 'I Love Lamb!' about 179 times.
I didn't sleep well last night thinking about the game, not because of my excitement, but out of fear. I would hate for something like this to happen:
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
I Can See It Coming...
UConn is going to get absolutely ripped up tonight (and not just cause Timmy Higgins is reffing the game), but that isn't the prediction here.
I predict Farmington's Finest, Tim Abromaitis, is going to have a huge game (and not just because of all the ProActiv scouts in the building to see the face-off, literally, between himself and Tyler Olander) for ND and it is going to lead to a stupid question about not recruiting him in Jimmy's postgame press conference.
This question might elicit a response like this:
"I've said it a thosan times.I fucked up by not taking Tim Abromaitis.It took 18 months to sell him to Notre Dame.It's been written about.I'm an idiot.I took Kemba Walker.I fucked up.Want me to say it?I fucked up."
I predict Farmington's Finest, Tim Abromaitis, is going to have a huge game (and not just because of all the ProActiv scouts in the building to see the face-off, literally, between himself and Tyler Olander) for ND and it is going to lead to a stupid question about not recruiting him in Jimmy's postgame press conference.
This question might elicit a response like this:
"I've said it a thosan times.I fucked up by not taking Tim Abromaitis.It took 18 months to sell him to Notre Dame.It's been written about.I'm an idiot.I took Kemba Walker.I fucked up.Want me to say it?I fucked up."
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Jeremy Hazell Shot Once In Robbery
Seton Hall guard Jeremy Hazell was shot once on Christmas during a robbery attempt. He is alive and
fine and all that, so let's get on to the jokes!
Possible headlines:
-Gunner gets gunned down
-Gunner gets his shot
-Hazell takes one shot, least shots ever taken
-On the court, only one shot would have killed him
-Bobby Gonzalez sought in attempted murder of Hazell
what, too soon?
fine and all that, so let's get on to the jokes!
Possible headlines:
-Gunner gets gunned down
-Gunner gets his shot
-Hazell takes one shot, least shots ever taken
-On the court, only one shot would have killed him
-Bobby Gonzalez sought in attempted murder of Hazell
what, too soon?
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Happy Birthday, Jesus
I'm probably going to hell, or die even earlier than anticipated, for this but Happy Birthday, Jesus!
Amazing trailer from an amazing film. The trailer captured many of the best scenes from the movie...
(in order of appearance)
1) - The baby Jesus getting worked out, at night, by Denzel.
2) - The governor wanted Jesus to go to "Big State" but only decided to play the Denzel card with "...the N.C. two A deadline a week away."
2a) - Big State. Really, Spike? I thought you were an all-time great filmmaker but you couldn't get the rights to anything so you settled on "Big State?" Really, Spike? Really? I mean, Come on...
3) - Ray: "What did I tell you about letting strangers in the house?!?"
Sister: "He's not a stranger, he's our father."
Ray: "I don't have a father!"
4) - Coach: "That's ten thousand dollars..."
Ray: "I don't need that money coach. (thinking to himself: Calipari gave Marcus Camby at least 26k and a harem of prostitutes and you're gonna offer me 10k with a straight face?!?! Fuck you, Whitey.) annnnnnd scene!
5 - The ankle monitor/arthritis scene. "Yeahhh, it's contagious."
6- Ray: "Jesus! Jesus! Why you name me that anyway?"
Denzel: "It's a biblical name."
Ray: "Yeah, no shit."
7 - It is, indeed, A Spike Lee Joint.
8 - The Coaches Montage, including Dean Smith and a Kansas Roy Williams. AWESOME!
Merry Chistmas
Amazing trailer from an amazing film. The trailer captured many of the best scenes from the movie...
(in order of appearance)
1) - The baby Jesus getting worked out, at night, by Denzel.
2) - The governor wanted Jesus to go to "Big State" but only decided to play the Denzel card with "...the N.C. two A deadline a week away."
2a) - Big State. Really, Spike? I thought you were an all-time great filmmaker but you couldn't get the rights to anything so you settled on "Big State?" Really, Spike? Really? I mean, Come on...
3) - Ray: "What did I tell you about letting strangers in the house?!?"
Sister: "He's not a stranger, he's our father."
Ray: "I don't have a father!"
4) - Coach: "That's ten thousand dollars..."
Ray: "I don't need that money coach. (thinking to himself: Calipari gave Marcus Camby at least 26k and a harem of prostitutes and you're gonna offer me 10k with a straight face?!?! Fuck you, Whitey.) annnnnnd scene!
5 - The ankle monitor/arthritis scene. "Yeahhh, it's contagious."
6- Ray: "Jesus! Jesus! Why you name me that anyway?"
Denzel: "It's a biblical name."
Ray: "Yeah, no shit."
7 - It is, indeed, A Spike Lee Joint.
8 - The Coaches Montage, including Dean Smith and a Kansas Roy Williams. AWESOME!
Merry Chistmas
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Unveiling the NEW Brick Tamland "I Love Lamb" T-Shirt
No one knows what they love about life more than Brick Tamland. He loves carpet, he loves desk, he loves lamp. But more than anything, he loves Jeremy Lamb. Tuesday, November 30, 2010
The "Holy Shit This Game Is Still Close I Better Get Some Scotch And Make This a Live Blog" Live Blog
10:40: 44-41
Tyler Olander beasts it (strong from all that cow tipping, a Mansfield pastime!) to take a 5 pt lead. I realized something about Olander earlier in this game, which I will get to after this rushed live blog.
10:06, 46-41
Roscoe Smith with a vicious swat into the 10th (ish) section. Crowd going crazy, perhaps I just effectively reverse jinxed UConn by starting this blog...
9:50, 46-41
A terrible charge call on Beverly draws the ire of Calhoun. I used to get sad when Beverly got taken out, but now it means Shabazz Napier Time!!!!
9:20
UNH makes a corner 3. Pesky (catamounts, black bears...what are kind of northern mascot are you people??) UNH makes it 46-45
8:51, 49-45
Napier with the And-1 to widen the UConn lead. Great defense on the way back, as well. I love this kid! 8 pts on the night
8:24, 49-48
STOP MAKING THREES!
8:05
Unless, of course, you are Shabazz Napier! A fearless three extends the UConn lead to 52-48. Napier is earning the italics I wrote his name in upon entering the game. 11 for him, 22 for Kemba, 19 for the rest of these mopes...
7:30, 52-48
Napier turns the ball over but had a UNH defender jumping at his pump fake from 25 feet. Get used to seeing a lot of that. This kid has some Rashad Anderson Fish Fry (TM) in him.
7:18
Hard foul on a Giffey breakaway. Camera flashes to first shot I've ever seen of German flag in the Student Section or any section of a UConn game for that matter. I'm speechless. Giffey goes 1-2, 53-48
5:18
End of Love Fest...TERRIBLE clear out three at the end of shotclock by Napier. Calhoun better get him the fuck outta there.
4:53
Really, Jimmy? Leaving him in here, ey? I guess this move speaks to how well Napier defends cause the way he ran that set was inexcusable. Somewhere Curtis Kelley is yelling at the TV (and probably Frank Martin as well) asking how Napier didn't get pulled. And somewhere else Scotty Harrelson and his amputated legs/knee replacements/tendonitis are screaming the same thing.
4:42
Two clanked free throws by UNH, after Napier's three started the fastbreak for them, leads to Kemba weaving through the lane for a layup and a 7 point lead. THANK GOD FOR KEMBA WALKER.
3:05
Two free throws by Kemba makes it 57-48. I know it's only UNH, but is there anyone in the nation who is going to be able to defend Kemba's speed/handle? I don't think so
2:17, 57-50
Kemba steals the postgame award for "Best Way to Kill a Crucial Possession" from Napier. Take that, Freshman! Meanwhile, Napier is writhing in pain after crashing into the bench while chasing Kemba's long rebound. Great...
1:05
He's more than just the Best Point Guard in College Basketball, he's also a teacher...Kemba yells at Roscoe Smith before the UNH inbounds "think, think, use your head!"
1:00, 58-53
UNH makes a long three just as the game looks in hand. Of course they do..
0:43
UConn is 19-24 from the line. They are winning games this year because of how well they are shooting from the line. More on this later in the week...
0:28
Kemba strokes in another FT for his 30th point of the night.
Final: UConn 62, UNH 55
Good night and god bless
Tyler Olander beasts it (strong from all that cow tipping, a Mansfield pastime!) to take a 5 pt lead. I realized something about Olander earlier in this game, which I will get to after this rushed live blog.
10:06, 46-41
Roscoe Smith with a vicious swat into the 10th (ish) section. Crowd going crazy, perhaps I just effectively reverse jinxed UConn by starting this blog...
9:50, 46-41
A terrible charge call on Beverly draws the ire of Calhoun. I used to get sad when Beverly got taken out, but now it means Shabazz Napier Time!!!!
9:20
UNH makes a corner 3. Pesky (catamounts, black bears...what are kind of northern mascot are you people??) UNH makes it 46-45
8:51, 49-45
Napier with the And-1 to widen the UConn lead. Great defense on the way back, as well. I love this kid! 8 pts on the night
8:24, 49-48
STOP MAKING THREES!
8:05
Unless, of course, you are Shabazz Napier! A fearless three extends the UConn lead to 52-48. Napier is earning the italics I wrote his name in upon entering the game. 11 for him, 22 for Kemba, 19 for the rest of these mopes...
7:30, 52-48
Napier turns the ball over but had a UNH defender jumping at his pump fake from 25 feet. Get used to seeing a lot of that. This kid has some Rashad Anderson Fish Fry (TM) in him.
7:18
Hard foul on a Giffey breakaway. Camera flashes to first shot I've ever seen of German flag in the Student Section or any section of a UConn game for that matter. I'm speechless. Giffey goes 1-2, 53-48
5:18
End of Love Fest...TERRIBLE clear out three at the end of shotclock by Napier. Calhoun better get him the fuck outta there.
4:53
Really, Jimmy? Leaving him in here, ey? I guess this move speaks to how well Napier defends cause the way he ran that set was inexcusable. Somewhere Curtis Kelley is yelling at the TV (and probably Frank Martin as well) asking how Napier didn't get pulled. And somewhere else Scotty Harrelson and his amputated legs/knee replacements/tendonitis are screaming the same thing.
4:42
Two clanked free throws by UNH, after Napier's three started the fastbreak for them, leads to Kemba weaving through the lane for a layup and a 7 point lead. THANK GOD FOR KEMBA WALKER.
3:05
Two free throws by Kemba makes it 57-48. I know it's only UNH, but is there anyone in the nation who is going to be able to defend Kemba's speed/handle? I don't think so
2:17, 57-50
Kemba steals the postgame award for "Best Way to Kill a Crucial Possession" from Napier. Take that, Freshman! Meanwhile, Napier is writhing in pain after crashing into the bench while chasing Kemba's long rebound. Great...
1:05
He's more than just the Best Point Guard in College Basketball, he's also a teacher...Kemba yells at Roscoe Smith before the UNH inbounds "think, think, use your head!"
1:00, 58-53
UNH makes a long three just as the game looks in hand. Of course they do..
0:43
UConn is 19-24 from the line. They are winning games this year because of how well they are shooting from the line. More on this later in the week...
0:28
Kemba strokes in another FT for his 30th point of the night.
Final: UConn 62, UNH 55
Good night and god bless
Sunday, November 28, 2010
I'm on a Boat, motherfucker!
UConn recruit Ryan Boatright puts up a fancy 55-10-10 over the holiday weekend.
http://www.maxpreps.com/news/13MuCfpMEd-XkQAcxJSkrA/uconn-bound-ryan-boatright-scores-55,-duke-signee-austin-rivers-goes-for-46.htm
(via Mike Anthony, courant.com)
I know what you're thinking...Todd didn't really do anything here because he simply took the link from Mike Anthony's blog. However, I did do something which Anthony cannot...I got to make an enjoyable play on Boatwright's name in my Headline and include the word 'motherfucker.'
http://www.maxpreps.com/news/13MuCfpMEd-XkQAcxJSkrA/uconn-bound-ryan-boatright-scores-55,-duke-signee-austin-rivers-goes-for-46.htm
(via Mike Anthony, courant.com)
I know what you're thinking...Todd didn't really do anything here because he simply took the link from Mike Anthony's blog. However, I did do something which Anthony cannot...I got to make an enjoyable play on Boatwright's name in my Headline and include the word 'motherfucker.'
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Early Impressions
What I think of a few UConn players so far this year...
Neils Giffey -
Woah, woah, woah..he's white? I guess just cause his last name sounded like Ken Griffey's I figured he was black. I should have given a little more weight to Giffey being from Germany. Anyway, he's no star but he's shown he is a scraper and if he gets his shot down he could be a real threat. Expect Giffey to go by "The CT Nowitzki" in no time. OR he could be Ben Eaves 2.0...
Tyler Olander -
While were on the topic of goofy white fellas, let's get to The Pride of Storrs, CT...Tyler Olander. Sure I'm startled by his initials being T.O., but I like him and moreover no kid from Storrs has gotten as much playing time as Olander since the Jeff Calhoun era. Think he's getting TV time now? Just wait til he starts doing ProActiv commercials...
Shabazz Napier -
Did I spell that right? Anyway, I look forward to a lot of this kid. He has star quality and probably also has every pussy in the greater Mansfield area just dripping wet. Good for you, Shabazz...
Kenna Walker -
I'm sorry, who are you and where did this fellow who has taken over your body come from??
Jeremy Lamb -
"I Love Lamb!" t-shirts with the face of Brick Tamland coming soon. Pre-order at uconn77duke74@gmail.com.
Roscoe Smith -
Thus far you are a disappointment to me. Ever notice Jimmy C's best players aren't his McDonalds All-Americans? The Okafors, Butlers, and Gordons of the world weren't hotly recruited but Jimmy made them, and many others, into top NBA draft picks. Roscoe...you sir, have work to do.
Alex Oriakhi - He is one of a few things... 1) Kevin Freeman with more size/athleticism. 2) a literate Johnnie Selvie. 3) Jeff Adrien with coordination.
I am rooting for #1, however, none of those are an insult.
Neils Giffey -
Woah, woah, woah..he's white? I guess just cause his last name sounded like Ken Griffey's I figured he was black. I should have given a little more weight to Giffey being from Germany. Anyway, he's no star but he's shown he is a scraper and if he gets his shot down he could be a real threat. Expect Giffey to go by "The CT Nowitzki" in no time. OR he could be Ben Eaves 2.0...
Tyler Olander -
While were on the topic of goofy white fellas, let's get to The Pride of Storrs, CT...Tyler Olander. Sure I'm startled by his initials being T.O., but I like him and moreover no kid from Storrs has gotten as much playing time as Olander since the Jeff Calhoun era. Think he's getting TV time now? Just wait til he starts doing ProActiv commercials...
Shabazz Napier -
Did I spell that right? Anyway, I look forward to a lot of this kid. He has star quality and probably also has every pussy in the greater Mansfield area just dripping wet. Good for you, Shabazz...
Kenna Walker -
I'm sorry, who are you and where did this fellow who has taken over your body come from??
Jeremy Lamb -
"I Love Lamb!" t-shirts with the face of Brick Tamland coming soon. Pre-order at uconn77duke74@gmail.com.
Roscoe Smith -
Thus far you are a disappointment to me. Ever notice Jimmy C's best players aren't his McDonalds All-Americans? The Okafors, Butlers, and Gordons of the world weren't hotly recruited but Jimmy made them, and many others, into top NBA draft picks. Roscoe...you sir, have work to do.
Alex Oriakhi - He is one of a few things... 1) Kevin Freeman with more size/athleticism. 2) a literate Johnnie Selvie. 3) Jeff Adrien with coordination.
I am rooting for #1, however, none of those are an insult.
Friday, March 5, 2010
Where was this two months ago?
Georgetown's Austin Freeman has been diagnosed with diabetes. Normally I wouldn't make fun of something like this (yes I would), but Freeman dropped 28 on UConn in the second half of that dick-punch rally game at Gtown this year...so fuck'em.
I think this video will help Austin better understand the disease he has to live with.
I think this video will help Austin better understand the disease he has to live with.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Senior Day!
Senior Day is usually filled with tears, flowers, and framed jerseys. But after 4 years of waiting we finally get to see FORMER NFL STAR EARL EDWARDS!!!! Did you know his son Gavin plays power forward for UConn?
Friday, February 19, 2010
Caronimo!
I meant to post this when the trade went down, but, well, it was a long weekend. Anyway, when Jeff Van Gundy said Caron had "too many field goal attempts tonight" I remembered it was on me to show JVG who's boss. Try to watch this clip and not get misty...
Monday, February 15, 2010
Jerome Dyson: Tweeting to Victory
Jerome Dyson isn't a regular Tweeter but he fired off 4 nice ones today. Let's see what Jerome was up to before upsetting Nova...
slicenanddice I hate morning unless I'm waking up to something sexy. (11hrs ago)
My Take: I couldn't agree more. It's why I get in a nice naked flex before my shower every morning. But seriously, that's a nice job by Jerome - up to five different women who slept with him this wk might feel this tweet is just for them...
slicenanddice Shoot around (10 hrs ago)
slicenanddice Bout to get one of those good o philly steak and cheese (8hrs ago)
My Take: As someone who dabbles in Paleo (I try to follow the rules- except those about alcohol) I do not view this as a healthy pregame meal. Having said that, it's better than Lamar Odom eating candy (or Khloe Kardashian's pussy, for that matter...) as his pregame meal.
slicenanddice bout to take a fuckin nap (7hrs ago)
My Take: Is a "Fuckin Nap" the same thing as a Wet Dream?
UPDATE:
slicenanddice That's a fuck road win ppl
My Take: Yes it is. Yes. It. Is.
slicenanddice I hate morning unless I'm waking up to something sexy. (11hrs ago)
My Take: I couldn't agree more. It's why I get in a nice naked flex before my shower every morning. But seriously, that's a nice job by Jerome - up to five different women who slept with him this wk might feel this tweet is just for them...
slicenanddice Shoot around (10 hrs ago)
slicenanddice Bout to get one of those good o philly steak and cheese (8hrs ago)
My Take: As someone who dabbles in Paleo (I try to follow the rules- except those about alcohol) I do not view this as a healthy pregame meal. Having said that, it's better than Lamar Odom eating candy (or Khloe Kardashian's pussy, for that matter...) as his pregame meal.
slicenanddice bout to take a fuckin nap (7hrs ago)
My Take: Is a "Fuckin Nap" the same thing as a Wet Dream?
UPDATE:
slicenanddice That's a fuck road win ppl
My Take: Yes it is. Yes. It. Is.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
A 77-74.com Field Trip!
For the first time in the history of this mess the entire 77-74.com staff will be broadcasting to you from the Extra Large Center at Noon as the Huskies take on Marquette.
Hilarity is expected on the part of 77-74.com; what is expected from UConn is still up in the air. The past two games they've shown the "rich man/poor man" versions of the teams, with a 14 point blowout over #1 Texas and a 15 point loss to unranked Providence. I can't remember any UConn team having two more different performances back to back like this. So again, anything is in play this afternoon; Kemba may change Jordan's 15 times midgame, Calhoun might make a glorious return to the bench only to have to leave with IBS, Mandeldove might even play!! (Ok, i added the last one for effect. Maybe the last two. But Kemba does change shoes more than Tiger changes white blonde women)
Look at it this way; let's say you're a college kid, decide to go to the bar on a Friday night. Start celebrating a little bit, have a little too much to drink, and suddenly everyone in the bar starts looking good. Really good. You walk up and start talking to some young lady, the conversation gets good, you buy her a few drinks, maybe go to the dance floor (hopefully no one has swooped in for the robbery by this point). and from here, yadi yadi yada, you go back to her place, a few more yadi yada's and then you wake up the next morning. and all of a sudden this once attractive female is a zoo creature, and you start to feel naucious. (this is not gender specific ladies; and if you've never woken up to someone the next morning and said 'shit, probably shouldnt have done that', THEN YOU'RE THAT PERSON!)
texas was that night at the bar; providence was the morning after.
Live Updates to Come...
-4-
Hilarity is expected on the part of 77-74.com; what is expected from UConn is still up in the air. The past two games they've shown the "rich man/poor man" versions of the teams, with a 14 point blowout over #1 Texas and a 15 point loss to unranked Providence. I can't remember any UConn team having two more different performances back to back like this. So again, anything is in play this afternoon; Kemba may change Jordan's 15 times midgame, Calhoun might make a glorious return to the bench only to have to leave with IBS, Mandeldove might even play!! (Ok, i added the last one for effect. Maybe the last two. But Kemba does change shoes more than Tiger changes white blonde women)
Look at it this way; let's say you're a college kid, decide to go to the bar on a Friday night. Start celebrating a little bit, have a little too much to drink, and suddenly everyone in the bar starts looking good. Really good. You walk up and start talking to some young lady, the conversation gets good, you buy her a few drinks, maybe go to the dance floor (hopefully no one has swooped in for the robbery by this point). and from here, yadi yadi yada, you go back to her place, a few more yadi yada's and then you wake up the next morning. and all of a sudden this once attractive female is a zoo creature, and you start to feel naucious. (this is not gender specific ladies; and if you've never woken up to someone the next morning and said 'shit, probably shouldnt have done that', THEN YOU'RE THAT PERSON!)
texas was that night at the bar; providence was the morning after.
Live Updates to Come...
-4-
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Curtis Kelly Isn't Used to Press Conferences
Skip to "Not Top Play" #8 at the 0:31 mark. If this UConn reject can clean up against Texas then I think we have a chance.
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