Seeing how it is Christmas Eve and everyone, other than the Jews, are out of money from ridiculous gift buying sprees, I thought it would be fun to see how much money other people have.
We know UConn is one of the leaders for players in the league, but let's see how much money they are owed...
Ben Gordon: 66 million
Charlie Villanueva: 38 million
Richard Hamilton: 50 million ... that's right, the Pistons owe UConn alums 154million thru 2013/14
Ray Allen: 20 million
Josh Boone: 5 million
AJ Price: 2 million
Caron Butler: 20 million
Rudy Gay: 8 million (2 yrs left on rookie scale - about to make a TON)
Thabeet: 29 million
Hilton Armstrong: 7 million
Emeka Okafor: 63 million (ahhh, it burns! what a horrible contract...)
Kevin Ollie: 1million
For a grand total of 12 players (sure, it's a down year, but we'll add Stanley and Jerome next year)
Those 12 players are owed 309 million over the life of their contracts, or 25.75/player (sorry Kevin Ollie, I know that # is skewed a bit. You won't see all of that projection...)
Anyway, nice to see some people are doing well. May I suggest they give some to this generous man... who hopefully will replace Hathaway someday soon
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
1st Semester Grades: Alex Hornat & Kyle Bailey
Grade: B
At first glance this grade might seem gratuitous considering the two have combined for 4 minutes played and 1 assist so far this season. But when considering walk-on’s we have to look beyond the numbers to measure their true value to the team. This grade is based on:
1) They bring heart. Knowing they will never appear on the floor, the walk-on needs to find other ways to influence a game. Look no further than the recent Kentucky game at Madison Square Garden. As Kemba’s desperation 3 falls short at the buzzer and is grabbed by Kentucky, who are the first players to spring off the bench and plead for a goaltending call? And if it wasn’t for them chasing down rebounds during warm-up’s, how would Jerome get all his jumpers in?
2) They got their names on jerseys. The beautiful thing about the blog at this phase is that with fewer readers than Tiger has mistresses, if I make a mistake no one notices. But in the one game they appeared in I thought both Bailey and Hornat had their names on the back. Will Rachel Uchitel please e-mail 77-74.com and let us know whether this is true; otherwise I’ll have to go with…
3) They got included in the team photo. For the rest of their lives, these kids will have their face next to future NBA’ers, immortalized on refrigerator magnets, posters, and whatever kind of promo gear the school decides to hand out. Twenty years from now they can pull out this photo and laugh about how lucky they were to play with some of these guys. Perhaps Stewie could do the voiceover: “NBA, NBA, playing overseas in Italy, NBA, incarcerated, NBA, playing overseas in Turkey”. Seriously though, it’s pretty cool and don’t think I haven’t tried to photoshop my face into that photo. And it’s possible because…
4) They are white. Normally this topic is way off-limits, but after reading Mike DiMauro’s article in The Day, apparently it’s fair game. His contention is that the decline in attendance at UConn men’s and women’s games isn’t due to the slumping economy but rather to a lack of contributing white players. So if you follow like I do then the implications are two fold: 1) that Calhoun and Auriemma have started to recruit more African-American players than in the past (which there is nothing wrong with), and 2) that Connecticut residents are racist (which will make a lot of people Elin levels of pissed off). DiMauro pretty much called the entire state of Connecticut bandwagon fans whose loyalty depends not on the success of the team but the number of white kids on the roster. So since we are all latent racist according to Freud DiMauro, I have to give out crazy extra points to my light skinned brothers.
At first glance this grade might seem gratuitous considering the two have combined for 4 minutes played and 1 assist so far this season. But when considering walk-on’s we have to look beyond the numbers to measure their true value to the team. This grade is based on:
1) They bring heart. Knowing they will never appear on the floor, the walk-on needs to find other ways to influence a game. Look no further than the recent Kentucky game at Madison Square Garden. As Kemba’s desperation 3 falls short at the buzzer and is grabbed by Kentucky, who are the first players to spring off the bench and plead for a goaltending call? And if it wasn’t for them chasing down rebounds during warm-up’s, how would Jerome get all his jumpers in?
2) They got their names on jerseys. The beautiful thing about the blog at this phase is that with fewer readers than Tiger has mistresses, if I make a mistake no one notices. But in the one game they appeared in I thought both Bailey and Hornat had their names on the back. Will Rachel Uchitel please e-mail 77-74.com and let us know whether this is true; otherwise I’ll have to go with…
3) They got included in the team photo. For the rest of their lives, these kids will have their face next to future NBA’ers, immortalized on refrigerator magnets, posters, and whatever kind of promo gear the school decides to hand out. Twenty years from now they can pull out this photo and laugh about how lucky they were to play with some of these guys. Perhaps Stewie could do the voiceover: “NBA, NBA, playing overseas in Italy, NBA, incarcerated, NBA, playing overseas in Turkey”. Seriously though, it’s pretty cool and don’t think I haven’t tried to photoshop my face into that photo. And it’s possible because…
4) They are white. Normally this topic is way off-limits, but after reading Mike DiMauro’s article in The Day, apparently it’s fair game. His contention is that the decline in attendance at UConn men’s and women’s games isn’t due to the slumping economy but rather to a lack of contributing white players. So if you follow like I do then the implications are two fold: 1) that Calhoun and Auriemma have started to recruit more African-American players than in the past (which there is nothing wrong with), and 2) that Connecticut residents are racist (which will make a lot of people Elin levels of pissed off). DiMauro pretty much called the entire state of Connecticut bandwagon fans whose loyalty depends not on the success of the team but the number of white kids on the roster. So since we are all latent racist according to Freud DiMauro, I have to give out crazy extra points to my light skinned brothers.
Monday, December 14, 2009
1st Semester Grades
Now that the first semester is over, 77-74.com is dishing out grades for each UConn player so far this season. Check back daily from now till UConn resumes play on Dec. 20th as we unveil the 77-74.com 1st Semester Grades.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
UConn/Kentucky Live Blog - "The John Wall Show"
9:37 - Normally I think Dicky V is more excited for a game like this than anyone else. But ESPN just showed John Wall in lay-up line and, honestly, I came in my pants a little bit.
9:38 - By the way...there is NO WAY UConn wins tonight. NO WAY. But for those of you who follow Vegas action, the line opened as UKY-1 and immediately moved to UConn-1.5. Something fishy is going on here - the smart money is confident UConn can win tonight.
9:42 - UKY 4, UConn 0.
Here is my last chance to embarrass John Wall tonight, compliments of Miami's DeQuan Jones (from when they were both in high school), cause UKY is about to RUN AWAY.
9:45 - A quick 2 on the Chuckwagon. He's only averaging 1.5 fouls per minute. Really...
9:49 - UKY12, UConn0 - John Wall, 6 pts, 3 steals. Who's better than advertised - John Wall or my Twitter recommendation to bet on UKY?
9:53 - UConn scores. After 5 mins of game time the UConn fans can finally step down and stop clapping.
9:54 - Dan Shulman "from the day he (Calipari) was named head coach he was out in the community." And unlike Rick Pitino he wasn't raping cougs!
9:58 - Donnell Beverly! and its a 10-0 Uconn run to make it 12-10.
9:59 - Oriakhi dunk! That's a man's move! Ohhhh yeahhhhh!
10:07 - See, here's why I hate Chris Berman. Every time the UKY kid Bledsoe's name gets said, in my mind I say "much he had a contusion!" God damn you Chris Berman!
10:13 - Holy Fouls, Batman! John Wall and seemingly the rest of the UKY starting five have 2 fouls/each. Uconn up one, this just got ver-weee intervesting...
10:19 - Terrible shot by Bledso "terrible" jon and I agree. Gavin throws the outlet pass outta bounds. "More terrible" we agree.
10:22 - Dicky V says Patterson played in HS with OJ Mayo. How did Patterson ever make it to UKY after only touching the ball 2times a game alongside Mayo?
10:31- Technical Difficulties brought to you by the worldwide leader in sports, ESPN...AWESOME! At the half, UConn29, UKY23
10:32 - Despite the first 5 minutes of the game, UKY is shooting 29%. That's Duke and UKY who UConn have held below 30%. While our shooting might suck, is it possible we play REALLY good defense?
10:50 - I'm not sure what has more technical difficulties: this broadcast or me when I'm fucking...
10:51 -This broadcast is more erratic than Tiger's penis.
10:51 - That's FOUR on the Chuckwagon in about 4 minutes of game time! geez....
10:54 - Orton just manhandled Oriakhi - did not think I would ever see that
11:00 - Jon points out, and Dicky V confirms, that with 15 mins left in the game no one has made a 3.
11:01- great challenge by Jamal on the break. Trice is nice!
Having said that, the kid has only 2 points this year and when you have to play him at the point you are toooo thin at a position.
11:05- and with 13mins to play Dyson knocks down the first three of the game.
11:06 - Cousins just ABUSED Oriakhi in the post. Just amazing. Unbelievable.
11:08 - with 11:30 left to play, this is about to be a really good game. I'm psyched! This will certainly prove to be our downfall.
11:12 - I realize these blogs are much funnier when I do them from the games. This isn't even fun..
11:13 - Schulman "patterson is down!" Todd: "good, I hope you're broken!"
11:15 - Dicky V says...11:17, so, I typed that and looked away and now I forgot what I was going to say
11:19 - Jerome Dyson gets stuffed by the rim while doing his best impression of me trying to dunk on an 8 foot hoop after a long night of drinking.
11:29 - I'm apoplectic right now. This game is crazy - I have nothing to say, but it's been ten minutes. Luckily, my live blog of Jersey Shore, episode 2, for PertinentMatters will be ACTION PACKED tomorrow. Includes live fantasy scoring. I need a big week out of J-WoWW and Angelina "Jolie" after getting run by DJ Paulie D and "Snooki" last week.
11:34 - OH! OH! I just remembered what I was going to say at 11:15! Dicky V says Mike Francesa is in the building...that is "yooge" for this game
11:37 - Bledsoe fouls out. Despite being down 2, I am CONFIDENT we can win this game if we shoot 80% the next 2:20.
11:39 - UConn forces the shot-clock violation. Turns out we might just be really good on D.
11:40 - Kemba with a huge shot to take a 1 pt lead. I'm Tiger Pumping in the living room! No, not that kind of Tiger Pump!
11:43 - For the record, I LOVED Jimmy putting Stanley on John Wall the last two possessions. You can't do anything about that shot. John Wall is just that fucking good. He is really fucking good.
11:49 - FUCKING CUNT!
9:38 - By the way...there is NO WAY UConn wins tonight. NO WAY. But for those of you who follow Vegas action, the line opened as UKY-1 and immediately moved to UConn-1.5. Something fishy is going on here - the smart money is confident UConn can win tonight.
9:42 - UKY 4, UConn 0.
Here is my last chance to embarrass John Wall tonight, compliments of Miami's DeQuan Jones (from when they were both in high school), cause UKY is about to RUN AWAY.
9:45 - A quick 2 on the Chuckwagon. He's only averaging 1.5 fouls per minute. Really...
9:49 - UKY12, UConn0 - John Wall, 6 pts, 3 steals. Who's better than advertised - John Wall or my Twitter recommendation to bet on UKY?
9:53 - UConn scores. After 5 mins of game time the UConn fans can finally step down and stop clapping.
9:54 - Dan Shulman "from the day he (Calipari) was named head coach he was out in the community." And unlike Rick Pitino he wasn't raping cougs!
9:58 - Donnell Beverly! and its a 10-0 Uconn run to make it 12-10.
9:59 - Oriakhi dunk! That's a man's move! Ohhhh yeahhhhh!
10:07 - See, here's why I hate Chris Berman. Every time the UKY kid Bledsoe's name gets said, in my mind I say "much he had a contusion!" God damn you Chris Berman!
10:13 - Holy Fouls, Batman! John Wall and seemingly the rest of the UKY starting five have 2 fouls/each. Uconn up one, this just got ver-weee intervesting...
10:19 - Terrible shot by Bledso "terrible" jon and I agree. Gavin throws the outlet pass outta bounds. "More terrible" we agree.
10:22 - Dicky V says Patterson played in HS with OJ Mayo. How did Patterson ever make it to UKY after only touching the ball 2times a game alongside Mayo?
10:31- Technical Difficulties brought to you by the worldwide leader in sports, ESPN...AWESOME! At the half, UConn29, UKY23
10:32 - Despite the first 5 minutes of the game, UKY is shooting 29%. That's Duke and UKY who UConn have held below 30%. While our shooting might suck, is it possible we play REALLY good defense?
10:50 - I'm not sure what has more technical difficulties: this broadcast or me when I'm fucking...
10:51 -This broadcast is more erratic than Tiger's penis.
10:51 - That's FOUR on the Chuckwagon in about 4 minutes of game time! geez....
10:54 - Orton just manhandled Oriakhi - did not think I would ever see that
11:00 - Jon points out, and Dicky V confirms, that with 15 mins left in the game no one has made a 3.
11:01- great challenge by Jamal on the break. Trice is nice!
Having said that, the kid has only 2 points this year and when you have to play him at the point you are toooo thin at a position.
11:05- and with 13mins to play Dyson knocks down the first three of the game.
11:06 - Cousins just ABUSED Oriakhi in the post. Just amazing. Unbelievable.
11:08 - with 11:30 left to play, this is about to be a really good game. I'm psyched! This will certainly prove to be our downfall.
11:12 - I realize these blogs are much funnier when I do them from the games. This isn't even fun..
11:13 - Schulman "patterson is down!" Todd: "good, I hope you're broken!"
11:15 - Dicky V says...11:17, so, I typed that and looked away and now I forgot what I was going to say
11:19 - Jerome Dyson gets stuffed by the rim while doing his best impression of me trying to dunk on an 8 foot hoop after a long night of drinking.
11:29 - I'm apoplectic right now. This game is crazy - I have nothing to say, but it's been ten minutes. Luckily, my live blog of Jersey Shore, episode 2, for PertinentMatters will be ACTION PACKED tomorrow. Includes live fantasy scoring. I need a big week out of J-WoWW and Angelina "Jolie" after getting run by DJ Paulie D and "Snooki" last week.
11:34 - OH! OH! I just remembered what I was going to say at 11:15! Dicky V says Mike Francesa is in the building...that is "yooge" for this game
11:37 - Bledsoe fouls out. Despite being down 2, I am CONFIDENT we can win this game if we shoot 80% the next 2:20.
11:39 - UConn forces the shot-clock violation. Turns out we might just be really good on D.
11:40 - Kemba with a huge shot to take a 1 pt lead. I'm Tiger Pumping in the living room! No, not that kind of Tiger Pump!
11:43 - For the record, I LOVED Jimmy putting Stanley on John Wall the last two possessions. You can't do anything about that shot. John Wall is just that fucking good. He is really fucking good.
11:49 - FUCKING CUNT!
You Heard It Here First, Harkless to UConn
As Dan told you on Monday, Maurice Harkless will be headed to UConn. It was confirmed today by Zagsblog.net.
NEW YORK — Maurice Harkless has made his college choice.
“I will be going to the University of Connecticut,” the 6-foot-7, 180-pound Harkless, 16, said Wednesday afternoon in the SNY studio in midtown Manhattan.
Harkless, a junior wing at Forest Hills High School in Queens, N.Y., is the No. 12 small forward and No. 50 player overall in the Class of 2011, according to Rivals.
Harkless is coming back from a broken metatarsil bone in his left foot. In his first game back he scored 21 points in Forest Hills’ 60-57 loss to Wings Academy on Sunday.
A year ago, he helped lead his high school team to the Queens borough crown and the PSAL Class AA quarterfinals.
Harkless chose UConn over Seton Hall, St. John’s, Kentucky and Fordham.Your Dan Poneman Highlight of the Day!
Todd found the new height of unintentional comedy in his post of a Corey Joseph interview with Dan Poneman. In out latest adventure, "Your Man Dan Poneman" is found interviewing what appears to be a 10 year old while wearing a sweater he stole from Billy Madison. Only 3 1/2 hours left to kill till Kentucky. Emjoy
Monday, December 7, 2009
Some People Call Me 'Uconn's next recruit'
Whether or not you get the Steve Miller reference, Maurice Harkless, a top 50 player from the class of 2011, is nearing his college decision and will announce on Wednesday, per The New York Post.
UConn is the only big name school that appears on both lists, plus he's already visited multiple times, loves the campus and Calhoun. An early welcome to Storrs from the 77-74.com staff.
If you're not convinced on the kid, enjoy this video. I think he's the one in the yellow. God help us if he's not the one in the yellow.
UConn is the only big name school that appears on both lists, plus he's already visited multiple times, loves the campus and Calhoun. An early welcome to Storrs from the 77-74.com staff.
If you're not convinced on the kid, enjoy this video. I think he's the one in the yellow. God help us if he's not the one in the yellow.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Cory Joseph
Saw this video of Cory Joseph (Draftexpress.com profile) on Mike Anthony's blog, but wanted to share it here. I mean, 5 people read this blog but NO ONE reads Mike's blog. Except for me, of course, when I need to poach material.
Before I get into where I think he's going, let me say one thing. I know what you're thinking...why do white Canadians talk like Canucks but black Canadians talk like black people? I don't know what the answer is, but it is quite thought provoking. I never heard Denham Brown profess his love for french fries and gravy or yell, 'Pass it here, ey.' Speaking of Denham, let's get him on this kids case. I mean there can't be that many black Canadians...odds are they probably know each other.
And one other thing - someone needs to Jimmy Clausen this Dan Pomeranz kid.
On to Joseph. UNLV and Minnesota are out - forget about it. Nova and Texas are clearly the front runners, and he is keeping UConn in the mix because Jimmy gets people to the pros. When he started raving about coaches personalities you knew UConn was going to be at a disadvantage. So I'm not going to get too worked up about this kid. I hope he goes to Texas and Rick Barnes ruins another career. Keep me posted though, Danny boy.
Before I get into where I think he's going, let me say one thing. I know what you're thinking...why do white Canadians talk like Canucks but black Canadians talk like black people? I don't know what the answer is, but it is quite thought provoking. I never heard Denham Brown profess his love for french fries and gravy or yell, 'Pass it here, ey.' Speaking of Denham, let's get him on this kids case. I mean there can't be that many black Canadians...odds are they probably know each other.
And one other thing - someone needs to Jimmy Clausen this Dan Pomeranz kid.
On to Joseph. UNLV and Minnesota are out - forget about it. Nova and Texas are clearly the front runners, and he is keeping UConn in the mix because Jimmy gets people to the pros. When he started raving about coaches personalities you knew UConn was going to be at a disadvantage. So I'm not going to get too worked up about this kid. I hope he goes to Texas and Rick Barnes ruins another career. Keep me posted though, Danny boy.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Saturday, November 28, 2009
A Little Extra "Hop" in Stanley's Step
From Mike Anthony, Hartford Courant
November 26, 2009
"It's hard for me to, due to privacy, as I should have about my players," Calhoun said. "It's a medical reason Stanley off the court. I would hope you don't have any misconceptions with Stanley. It was a medical situation he needed medication for. It had nothing with him being a wild kid or not going to class. I've read those things and it's completely so far from the truth. He's a great kid who had incredible focus problems. Just problems. Bottom line is ... he's always been a happy kid in certain ways, but sometimes he's a sad kid, too. He's a great kid. He finds joy playing again. That's really nice to see.
"The situation where he was not being able to do a lot of things focus-wise, otherwise, and everything was going to pot to be quite honest with you.
Stanley is on Adderall! This is tremendous news. Forget focusing...you just took one of the best all around athletes in college basketball and legally hopped him up on amphetamines! This is great news. Take it from someone who is prescribed this shit, "Diet Coke" doesn't go far enough in qualifying it's effects. Sweet Jesus, the man is going to be unstoppable! I tend to have a problem with it making my heart race...let's just hope Stanley doesn't end up like this. What, they make one 30 for 30 doc and all of a sudden it's "too soon" again...?
November 26, 2009
"It's hard for me to, due to privacy, as I should have about my players," Calhoun said. "It's a medical reason Stanley off the court. I would hope you don't have any misconceptions with Stanley. It was a medical situation he needed medication for. It had nothing with him being a wild kid or not going to class. I've read those things and it's completely so far from the truth. He's a great kid who had incredible focus problems. Just problems. Bottom line is ... he's always been a happy kid in certain ways, but sometimes he's a sad kid, too. He's a great kid. He finds joy playing again. That's really nice to see.
"The situation where he was not being able to do a lot of things focus-wise, otherwise, and everything was going to pot to be quite honest with you.
Stanley is on Adderall! This is tremendous news. Forget focusing...you just took one of the best all around athletes in college basketball and legally hopped him up on amphetamines! This is great news. Take it from someone who is prescribed this shit, "Diet Coke" doesn't go far enough in qualifying it's effects. Sweet Jesus, the man is going to be unstoppable! I tend to have a problem with it making my heart race...let's just hope Stanley doesn't end up like this. What, they make one 30 for 30 doc and all of a sudden it's "too soon" again...?
Friday, November 27, 2009
Really?
I just saw this commercial during the Pitt/WVU game. This will be our first non college basketball post. Damn it's good though...
UConn/Duke Part 9 - The Live Blog
4:30 - Geez, I feel like shit. I got tested for Swine Flu on Wednesday, and they said I don't have it, but they are liars. That means this will be the first Live Blog where I'm not intoxicated. Let's see if the delirium from whatever flu I have makes up for my normal alcohol related punchiness. Should be interesting...
On another note, how 'bout the Tiger Woods car crash, huh? Geez, Tiger, you don't have to emulate Hogan in every way. How was alcohol not related at almost 3am on Thanksgiving - Is Tiger really that good of a person?
5:00 - I HATE Duke. Hate, Hate, Hate them. That said, I don't see how they can lose this game today. UConn looked wayyyy better than they really are against an undermanned LSU team. I mean, LSU had to play a white guy...with red hair! This is supposed to be big time college basketball, for christsakes!
The big question: What are the odds Stanley shows up for two consecutive games?
5:10 - Dicky V says there is a tentative agreement between UConn and Calhoun for a five year extension. I'm glad to hear that, but it's hard to imagine anyone would want to work for Jeff Hathaway. The big donors hate Hathaway but love Calhoun and Auriemma. Hathaway basically only speaks to Edsall as he is normally too busy tounging President Hogan's balls.
5:15 - Ryan Pierro is sitting directly behind the UConn bench - who the, how the, what the fuck!?! Lots of face time in the early going...he will corner people in bars and tell this story for years to come.
5:18 - Stanley with a fancy flush to put UConn up 16-14. Dick Vitale loses his mind, possibly has a brain aneurysm.
5:37 - The Chuckwagon...With the Follow!
5:38 - Singler picks up his third. Plumlee just got his third as well. Hey, Coach K, didn't Calhoun teach you a lesson about keeping players with two fouls in the first half on the bench? Tisk, tisk...
5:43 - Brian Zoubek is such a chode
5:45 - Is it bad that Jimmy just got T'd up and I don't care? The man can do no wrong in my eyes.
5:54 - Well that sucked - At the half, Duke 37 UConn 28
6:10 - Vitale just compared Plumlee to "the great shot blockers...the Bill Russell's, the David Robinson's..." wow - easy does it, Dicky.
6:30 - Blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
On another note, how 'bout the Tiger Woods car crash, huh? Geez, Tiger, you don't have to emulate Hogan in every way. How was alcohol not related at almost 3am on Thanksgiving - Is Tiger really that good of a person?
5:00 - I HATE Duke. Hate, Hate, Hate them. That said, I don't see how they can lose this game today. UConn looked wayyyy better than they really are against an undermanned LSU team. I mean, LSU had to play a white guy...with red hair! This is supposed to be big time college basketball, for christsakes!
The big question: What are the odds Stanley shows up for two consecutive games?
5:10 - Dicky V says there is a tentative agreement between UConn and Calhoun for a five year extension. I'm glad to hear that, but it's hard to imagine anyone would want to work for Jeff Hathaway. The big donors hate Hathaway but love Calhoun and Auriemma. Hathaway basically only speaks to Edsall as he is normally too busy tounging President Hogan's balls.
5:15 - Ryan Pierro is sitting directly behind the UConn bench - who the, how the, what the fuck!?! Lots of face time in the early going...he will corner people in bars and tell this story for years to come.
5:18 - Stanley with a fancy flush to put UConn up 16-14. Dick Vitale loses his mind, possibly has a brain aneurysm.
5:37 - The Chuckwagon...With the Follow!
5:38 - Singler picks up his third. Plumlee just got his third as well. Hey, Coach K, didn't Calhoun teach you a lesson about keeping players with two fouls in the first half on the bench? Tisk, tisk...
5:43 - Brian Zoubek is such a chode
5:45 - Is it bad that Jimmy just got T'd up and I don't care? The man can do no wrong in my eyes.
5:54 - Well that sucked - At the half, Duke 37 UConn 28
6:10 - Vitale just compared Plumlee to "the great shot blockers...the Bill Russell's, the David Robinson's..." wow - easy does it, Dicky.
6:30 - Blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Cincy
That little Mick has quite a squad this year. Granted I just watched them beat up on an overrated Maryland team (but then again, what ACC team isn't overrated?), but this is a team which is SO much better than anticipated.
Deonta Vaughan is a real talent, and this year he actually has players around him. Sophomore Yancy Gates is really good. I didn't even remember him from last year. And freshman Lance Stephenson is going to get better every game - I thought he was a scatterbrained kid last year at Lincoln, but he can be really good. I am pleasantly surprised. Gates/Stephenson have a chance to be the best forward combo in the Big East by year's end (I'm sure I just forgot someone), and a real force if they both stay in school next year.
As a team I'm not sure how deep they are, but we'll see. Definitely talented.
That will be all, I just wanted to call them out as being really good so I can recall this post all year. Damn I know basketball.
Deonta Vaughan is a real talent, and this year he actually has players around him. Sophomore Yancy Gates is really good. I didn't even remember him from last year. And freshman Lance Stephenson is going to get better every game - I thought he was a scatterbrained kid last year at Lincoln, but he can be really good. I am pleasantly surprised. Gates/Stephenson have a chance to be the best forward combo in the Big East by year's end (I'm sure I just forgot someone), and a real force if they both stay in school next year.
As a team I'm not sure how deep they are, but we'll see. Definitely talented.
That will be all, I just wanted to call them out as being really good so I can recall this post all year. Damn I know basketball.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Live Blog- UConn v. Toothpaste
5:30 - I'm going to be honest with you...I am absolutely coming down with some kind of cross between the swine flu and strep throat. I should be sitting at home and asleep early rather than abusively drinking. But much like Jordan, it won't keep me from playing tonight. If there's a game, I'm bringing it- and unlike Jordan I won't need to push off to hit the game winner. I'll be on fire all night, or, more likely, until my iPhone runs out of batteries, gets lost, or is dropped in a pitcher of beer.
There's a lot of easy Colgate jokes to make, for now I'm going to refer to them as Toothpaste, but if they start five Caucasians I'm changing to The White Strips.
Also, I love Toothpaste getting like 28 tonight. They return all five starters and get another guy back who was injured all last year.
6:05 - Just saw AI getting waived by the Griz. The highlight? The footage of AI sitting next to Marcus Williams on the bench - two dead point guards!
7:05 - I have been ordered by the powers that be to drive. Ah the perils of SUV ownership. I was also ordered to clean up the inside of my car (homeless people operate in cleaner environments). I point out that clean is a relative term
8:00 - arrive at Ted's. People want to get food...I disagree. Two pitchers of beers, food is for pussies. Let's go ladies....
9:00 - did the game just tip? Because Chris just opted to let the bartender choose our shots and she picked smirnoff raspberry. Let that be a lesson to u kids- choose your own shots.
910 - the game did tip. At least we didn't have to stand up and clap for that first basket bullshit.
915 - walking to Gampel. I miss college. Not for the people or community but for the nice fall days that = sorority chicks with black spandex and Uggs.
917 - Mack asks 2 hot chicks if they want tickets. From their reaction he may as well have asked them if they wanted to get raped.
924 - Mack asks, "who are we playing?...harvard?". I respond, " no there's only 4 white guys on the floor". And Chris follows with "no- there's no Asians starting"
927 - #13 on colgate is so white he looks like he stars in "Sons of Anarchy."
935 - you know how Duke has it's fans on the floor? Well I just counted 93 open lower bowl seats...on the other side of the arena.
937 - Le Moyne, errr Colgate, takes a 23-22 lead. So this is what sodomy feels like...
940 - Mackinnon asks what uconn is ranked. I respond "14". He says, damn, what is Colgate ranked, 5?
943 - Chris tells me about how the old Uconn cheerleading coach was getting BJs as a prison guard. Take it easy Eric Hayward, ohhhh!
945 - Jimmy takes his jacket off as we trail 24-26. I would rather get an enema than be a player in that locker room
946 - a girl walks in with a Jasper Howard tshirt. She's lucky she hasn't been stabbed yet...too soon?
946 - a trooper just walked in with a police dog...I hope i don't smell like pot too much
949 - Tim Higgins is having a great game
951 - if Stanley misses another free throw he can go back to Ruslyan and Prime Materials...
954- at the half it's... a...ball..game???UConn33, Toothpaste32
956 - as we wonder what the fuck is going on, for the first time that it doesn't relate to the bball team, 2 dozen burka clad and barefoot dancers come to center court and start dancing to Indian music. Fuckin slumdog millionaires out there. Whatever happened to hot chicks in spandex? The basketball was bad enough- we don't need
this shit.
1000 - they look like the Indian backup dancers for either A: the Indianapolis Colts, or B: a super faggy Indian version of the seton hall dancers
1013 -We just upgraded from the last row in 207 to eight rows behind uconn bench. When it's quiet I can hear Jimmy curse.
1017 - the Uconn dance cam : helping homosexuals outta the closet since 1998
1023 - we just made it on the uconn timeout cam. Mack will spend the next 5 minutes telling us what he would have done if he realized he was on camera
1025. If we lose cue the courant headline "Foyle-d Again". Sure he hasn't played there in 10 yrs but that's gold Jerry, gold!
1026 - sticks off glass- cue Billy raftery!
1027 - Timmy higgins wants his lucky charms back...
1032. This game is over. What a lousy effort at a cover. I need sons of anarchy to step it up
1033 - Gavin Edwards on another tip back! His dad Earl played in the NFL
1034 uconn62, colgate44. Cue me and Ben cheering vociferously for Colgate
1035- what's womens basketball? I keep hear the announcer talk about it in timeouts but I've never heard of said activity
1039. Send it in Stanley!
1041. Donnell Beverly is getting minutes. Bad sign for you, colgate
1045- hey, Jonathan Mandeldove, I recognize you from the Electric Blue!
1050 - uconn up 19 and colgate misses a bunny but gets fouled. But he's white so u know he's good from the line
1051. After a missing the first of two free throws, Mack suggests coombs-mcdaniel will "blow a line before he makes one from it"
1053. And were out. Looks like a cover!
There's a lot of easy Colgate jokes to make, for now I'm going to refer to them as Toothpaste, but if they start five Caucasians I'm changing to The White Strips.
Also, I love Toothpaste getting like 28 tonight. They return all five starters and get another guy back who was injured all last year.
6:05 - Just saw AI getting waived by the Griz. The highlight? The footage of AI sitting next to Marcus Williams on the bench - two dead point guards!
7:05 - I have been ordered by the powers that be to drive. Ah the perils of SUV ownership. I was also ordered to clean up the inside of my car (homeless people operate in cleaner environments). I point out that clean is a relative term
8:00 - arrive at Ted's. People want to get food...I disagree. Two pitchers of beers, food is for pussies. Let's go ladies....
9:00 - did the game just tip? Because Chris just opted to let the bartender choose our shots and she picked smirnoff raspberry. Let that be a lesson to u kids- choose your own shots.
910 - the game did tip. At least we didn't have to stand up and clap for that first basket bullshit.
915 - walking to Gampel. I miss college. Not for the people or community but for the nice fall days that = sorority chicks with black spandex and Uggs.
917 - Mack asks 2 hot chicks if they want tickets. From their reaction he may as well have asked them if they wanted to get raped.
924 - Mack asks, "who are we playing?...harvard?". I respond, " no there's only 4 white guys on the floor". And Chris follows with "no- there's no Asians starting"
927 - #13 on colgate is so white he looks like he stars in "Sons of Anarchy."
935 - you know how Duke has it's fans on the floor? Well I just counted 93 open lower bowl seats...on the other side of the arena.
937 - Le Moyne, errr Colgate, takes a 23-22 lead. So this is what sodomy feels like...
940 - Mackinnon asks what uconn is ranked. I respond "14". He says, damn, what is Colgate ranked, 5?
943 - Chris tells me about how the old Uconn cheerleading coach was getting BJs as a prison guard. Take it easy Eric Hayward, ohhhh!
945 - Jimmy takes his jacket off as we trail 24-26. I would rather get an enema than be a player in that locker room
946 - a girl walks in with a Jasper Howard tshirt. She's lucky she hasn't been stabbed yet...too soon?
946 - a trooper just walked in with a police dog...I hope i don't smell like pot too much
949 - Tim Higgins is having a great game
951 - if Stanley misses another free throw he can go back to Ruslyan and Prime Materials...
954- at the half it's... a...ball..game???UConn33, Toothpaste32
956 - as we wonder what the fuck is going on, for the first time that it doesn't relate to the bball team, 2 dozen burka clad and barefoot dancers come to center court and start dancing to Indian music. Fuckin slumdog millionaires out there. Whatever happened to hot chicks in spandex? The basketball was bad enough- we don't need
this shit.
1000 - they look like the Indian backup dancers for either A: the Indianapolis Colts, or B: a super faggy Indian version of the seton hall dancers
1013 -We just upgraded from the last row in 207 to eight rows behind uconn bench. When it's quiet I can hear Jimmy curse.
1017 - the Uconn dance cam : helping homosexuals outta the closet since 1998
1023 - we just made it on the uconn timeout cam. Mack will spend the next 5 minutes telling us what he would have done if he realized he was on camera
1025. If we lose cue the courant headline "Foyle-d Again". Sure he hasn't played there in 10 yrs but that's gold Jerry, gold!
1026 - sticks off glass- cue Billy raftery!
1027 - Timmy higgins wants his lucky charms back...
1032. This game is over. What a lousy effort at a cover. I need sons of anarchy to step it up
1033 - Gavin Edwards on another tip back! His dad Earl played in the NFL
1034 uconn62, colgate44. Cue me and Ben cheering vociferously for Colgate
1035- what's womens basketball? I keep hear the announcer talk about it in timeouts but I've never heard of said activity
1039. Send it in Stanley!
1041. Donnell Beverly is getting minutes. Bad sign for you, colgate
1045- hey, Jonathan Mandeldove, I recognize you from the Electric Blue!
1050 - uconn up 19 and colgate misses a bunny but gets fouled. But he's white so u know he's good from the line
1051. After a missing the first of two free throws, Mack suggests coombs-mcdaniel will "blow a line before he makes one from it"
1053. And were out. Looks like a cover!
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Live Blog
I will be live blogging the UConn/Colgate game from inside Gampel Pavilion on Monday. And probably from Ted's and Husky's too... Look for the blogging to kick off around 8pm and to get sloppy somewhere around 9pm
Friday, November 13, 2009
Thoughts from William&Mary
-Oriakhi and Coombs-McDaniel are the best package deal since Dirk Diggler was busing tables while charging 5 bucks to see his dick and 10 bucks if you wanted to see him jerk off.
-Alex Oriakhi is a beast. He's bigger than Gavin Edwards, and Gavin isn't of slight build...after all, his father Earl played in the NFL! I absolutely have an Oriakhi hard-on.
-William & Mary routinely threw a "whitewash" on the floor. Even Sammy Sosa thought they looked obnoxiously white.
-Bob Picozzi says the word "penetration" so frequently it's like him and Wenzel have some kind of over/under on how many times he says it.
-At the half: UConn37, WM31
-Not sure who is cursing more right now...Jimmy C in the locker room or (as I flip over to the Celtics/Hawks game) KG as he abuses Zaza Pachulia in the post, gets fouled, and screams motherfucker 14 times on the way to the line. I love KG...
-You will want to bet heavily and often against UConn this year. College basketball gambling is all about the point guards and we start a sophomore, then have a bunch of freshmen and Donnell Beverly. Oyyy...
-Final: UConn75, WM66. NOT GOOD
-Alex Oriakhi is a beast. He's bigger than Gavin Edwards, and Gavin isn't of slight build...after all, his father Earl played in the NFL! I absolutely have an Oriakhi hard-on.
-William & Mary routinely threw a "whitewash" on the floor. Even Sammy Sosa thought they looked obnoxiously white.
-Bob Picozzi says the word "penetration" so frequently it's like him and Wenzel have some kind of over/under on how many times he says it.
-At the half: UConn37, WM31
-Not sure who is cursing more right now...Jimmy C in the locker room or (as I flip over to the Celtics/Hawks game) KG as he abuses Zaza Pachulia in the post, gets fouled, and screams motherfucker 14 times on the way to the line. I love KG...
-You will want to bet heavily and often against UConn this year. College basketball gambling is all about the point guards and we start a sophomore, then have a bunch of freshmen and Donnell Beverly. Oyyy...
-Final: UConn75, WM66. NOT GOOD
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
UConn 47,968 - AIC 12
You can't take much from these exhibition games, aside from three top players, but hey - at least we didn't get Le Monye'd.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Further Evidence Rick Pitino Has No Morals
I am on fire right now. What a start to the blogging season! I am in the process of blowing everyone in the blogging field out of the water right now. Watch out...
From ESPN.com (mainly...)
LOUISVILLE, Ky. -- Louisville basketball players Jerry Smith and Terrence Jennings each will face only one charge stemming from their involvement in an altercation with off-duty police officers during the weekend.
The misdemeanor charge carries a maximum of one year in jail and a $5,000 fine. The police report initially asked the pair be charged with multiple counts.
Jennings, a 6-foot-10 sophomore from Sacramento, Calif., and Smith, a 6-foot-2 senior from Wauwatosa, Wis., are scheduled to appear Monday morning in Jeffersonville City Court.
Pitino told ESPN.com, "They will be punished and are being punished right now. But no, they will not miss game time. This is not a big deal. It's not like they raped a crazy, drunken coug and then paid for her abortion..."
The police report said several off-duty officers -- all of whom were wearing T-shirts with "Police" clearly marked on the front and back -- were working at the party when a fight broke out inside.
However, Jennings said he wasn't aware at the time he was being confronted by off-duty police. Teachers report Jennings is functionally illiterate.
Officers needed to strike Jennings twice with a Taser to subdue him, as Jennings screamed.
"I think Jerry saw a teammate on the ground and didn't want to abandon him," Pitino said. Adding, "I mean, in Jerry's defense, it's not like Jennings is a fetus. He can't just be abandoned."
"I think he saw a teammate taking some pretty good blows and tried to help." Pitino when on to say, "I wish my assistant had come to my aid that night at Porcini when he heard me taking some pretty good blows. You know, before I did something stupid in the kitchen..."
Dana O'Neil covers college basketball for ESPN.com and can be reached at espnoneil@live.com. Information from The Associated Press was used in this report.
Todd writes a foul-mouthed blog and likes to insert jokes perfectly into the context of legitimate news stories. He can be reached at uconn77duke74.com@gmail.com.
From ESPN.com (mainly...)
LOUISVILLE, Ky. -- Louisville basketball players Jerry Smith and Terrence Jennings each will face only one charge stemming from their involvement in an altercation with off-duty police officers during the weekend.
The misdemeanor charge carries a maximum of one year in jail and a $5,000 fine. The police report initially asked the pair be charged with multiple counts.
Jennings, a 6-foot-10 sophomore from Sacramento, Calif., and Smith, a 6-foot-2 senior from Wauwatosa, Wis., are scheduled to appear Monday morning in Jeffersonville City Court.
Pitino told ESPN.com, "They will be punished and are being punished right now. But no, they will not miss game time. This is not a big deal. It's not like they raped a crazy, drunken coug and then paid for her abortion..."
The police report said several off-duty officers -- all of whom were wearing T-shirts with "Police" clearly marked on the front and back -- were working at the party when a fight broke out inside.
However, Jennings said he wasn't aware at the time he was being confronted by off-duty police. Teachers report Jennings is functionally illiterate.
Officers needed to strike Jennings twice with a Taser to subdue him, as Jennings screamed.
"I think Jerry saw a teammate on the ground and didn't want to abandon him," Pitino said. Adding, "I mean, in Jerry's defense, it's not like Jennings is a fetus. He can't just be abandoned."
"I think he saw a teammate taking some pretty good blows and tried to help." Pitino when on to say, "I wish my assistant had come to my aid that night at Porcini when he heard me taking some pretty good blows. You know, before I did something stupid in the kitchen..."
Dana O'Neil covers college basketball for ESPN.com and can be reached at espnoneil@live.com. Information from The Associated Press was used in this report.
Todd writes a foul-mouthed blog and likes to insert jokes perfectly into the context of legitimate news stories. He can be reached at uconn77duke74.com@gmail.com.
Quote of the Week
Our quote of the week comes from the annual Husky Run last weekend. We sent our "man on the street" out to cover the event. He reported the following, which is out first Quote OF theweek!
Jerome Dyson (running past a pack of co-eds): "Banged her, banged her, gangbanged her, just oral, banged her, just anal..."
Jerome Dyson (running past a pack of co-eds): "Banged her, banged her, gangbanged her, just oral, banged her, just anal..."
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Jonathan Mandeldove Out
Jonathan Mandeldove will not play in the first semester, as reported by the Hartford Courant's Mike Anthony. I have been waiting for some kind of 'Dove news to share an entertaining evening I had with him a few months ago.
I was with some friends "paying the electric bill" at one of Tolland's finest establishments. We were sitting at the stage when 'Dove came wandering over and sat next to me.
People say he has a great sense of humor, so I decided to have some fun with him. We talked for a bit and then I started throwing dollars on the stage in front of him. When my first dollar missed and fell to the floor I shouted, "Look Dove! My jump shot is just as bad as yours!"
We offered to get some thoroughly vetted talent to help ease the pain of what Stone Mountain's finest had been reduced to, but he refused and sought out someone more to his liking. I told him to have fun back there, and if she choked to death it was her own fault.
When he came back I had some fun asking dancers, "Hey, do you know who this is?" When they said no I would just laugh and tell them, "Neither does anyone else!"
I suppose I might have been a bit harsh on 'Dove, but he took it in stride. I guess when you spend three years at UConn getting eviscerated by Jimmy Calhoun there isn't much I can say to upset you. Thankfully I was smart enough not to bring up our blog and the old JMFSSW
Good luck 'Dove, too bad you fattened up from the delectable Blue Buffett. Those pretzels and chips are irrrresistable!
I was with some friends "paying the electric bill" at one of Tolland's finest establishments. We were sitting at the stage when 'Dove came wandering over and sat next to me.
People say he has a great sense of humor, so I decided to have some fun with him. We talked for a bit and then I started throwing dollars on the stage in front of him. When my first dollar missed and fell to the floor I shouted, "Look Dove! My jump shot is just as bad as yours!"
We offered to get some thoroughly vetted talent to help ease the pain of what Stone Mountain's finest had been reduced to, but he refused and sought out someone more to his liking. I told him to have fun back there, and if she choked to death it was her own fault.
When he came back I had some fun asking dancers, "Hey, do you know who this is?" When they said no I would just laugh and tell them, "Neither does anyone else!"
I suppose I might have been a bit harsh on 'Dove, but he took it in stride. I guess when you spend three years at UConn getting eviscerated by Jimmy Calhoun there isn't much I can say to upset you. Thankfully I was smart enough not to bring up our blog and the old JMFSSW
Good luck 'Dove, too bad you fattened up from the delectable Blue Buffett. Those pretzels and chips are irrrresistable!
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Yesterday morning Dan and I were discussing when to get the blog back together. Well, thankfully Rick Pitino gave us the jumpstart we needed. I mean, rape AND abortion...you know what that is....
Here's some cheap one liners
-More overpriced: Those white suits Pitino wears, or 3k for an abortion?
-Coincidental: Pitino gave her the "old mushroom head" at a restaurant, Porcini, which is named after a mushroom.
-Pitino's pick up line: How bout a little gabagool in ya vag-arooney, ohhh!
-Finding themselves without lube Sypher went in the kitchen and got some garlic oil. Pitino told authorities he thought it was a clam sauce. So where did the fish smell come from?
-We've heard about Pitino's assistant, Vinnie Tatum, who was in the restaurant while the act occurred, however Pitino had another assistant with him as well, which has not been widely disseminated in the media reports. His name: Cialis.
-Tatum told police he had laid down in a booth and was unable to hear much other than what sounded to him like consensual sex. Also obstructing his hearing...his own moans while he masturbated.
Here's some cheap one liners
-More overpriced: Those white suits Pitino wears, or 3k for an abortion?
-Coincidental: Pitino gave her the "old mushroom head" at a restaurant, Porcini, which is named after a mushroom.
-Pitino's pick up line: How bout a little gabagool in ya vag-arooney, ohhh!
-Finding themselves without lube Sypher went in the kitchen and got some garlic oil. Pitino told authorities he thought it was a clam sauce. So where did the fish smell come from?
-We've heard about Pitino's assistant, Vinnie Tatum, who was in the restaurant while the act occurred, however Pitino had another assistant with him as well, which has not been widely disseminated in the media reports. His name: Cialis.
-Tatum told police he had laid down in a booth and was unable to hear much other than what sounded to him like consensual sex. Also obstructing his hearing...his own moans while he masturbated.
Monday, April 13, 2009
Hiatus...
If you haven't noticed I've completely given up on this site now that the season is over. It was a good run while it lasted. Thanks to all four of you who checked in regularly, it was an honor to try to make you laugh. We'll try to make a comeback for next season and also address the upcoming suspensions/probation/etc.
A final word on the season and the National Championship: We didn't deserve it, and it was really gravy to make it so far after the Dyson injury. God bless UNC, not just for the big -7.5 championship cover, but for their fans. Below is the clip of Franklin Street going crazy - 30k fans and TWO arrests depite about 50 mini bonfires.
Now if that is UCONN there are MAYBE 100 people running around campus because, 1- our school is now Lame, and 2- there would have been about 200 state police and Uconn police on horses and riot gear. One bonfire and the tear gas would have been flying. Disgusting...
A final word on the season and the National Championship: We didn't deserve it, and it was really gravy to make it so far after the Dyson injury. God bless UNC, not just for the big -7.5 championship cover, but for their fans. Below is the clip of Franklin Street going crazy - 30k fans and TWO arrests depite about 50 mini bonfires.
Now if that is UCONN there are MAYBE 100 people running around campus because, 1- our school is now Lame, and 2- there would have been about 200 state police and Uconn police on horses and riot gear. One bonfire and the tear gas would have been flying. Disgusting...
Friday, April 3, 2009
Crazy People
One of my biggest problems, particularly when I someday get a job, is I still laugh uncontrollably at juvenile words. Let's say I was in a meeting and someone told me I needed to do 'double-duty.' Or better yet the commercials for 'super-duty' trucks. They get me every time. Anyway, I took great joy in seeing this coach go crazy earlier in the week. Yes- because she says 'poop.' Poop, my friends. That's another reason womens basketball cannot be taken seriously.
Other reasons: Breakaway Lay-ups, Fat chicks, Ugly chicks
As a result of nothing fun happening at the Final Four yet, I've decided to post this lady's rant and a bunch of other great coaching meltdowns.
By the way, how fearful was her husband (or life partner) of that woman coming home that night. That's gonna be some ROUGH sex, yikes...
Other fun ones...
-Denny Green
-Mike Gundy
-Jimmy C, I took Emeka!
-Jimmy C, reporter
-Herm Edwards
-Hal McRae
-Jim Mora
-Allen Iverson, and yes, I know he's not a coach - but I love the way he's faded this year while Ray continues to thrive.
Other reasons: Breakaway Lay-ups, Fat chicks, Ugly chicks
As a result of nothing fun happening at the Final Four yet, I've decided to post this lady's rant and a bunch of other great coaching meltdowns.
By the way, how fearful was her husband (or life partner) of that woman coming home that night. That's gonna be some ROUGH sex, yikes...
Other fun ones...
-Denny Green
-Mike Gundy
-Jimmy C, I took Emeka!
-Jimmy C, reporter
-Herm Edwards
-Hal McRae
-Jim Mora
-Allen Iverson, and yes, I know he's not a coach - but I love the way he's faded this year while Ray continues to thrive.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Jesus!
While I take a quick break between playing 36 today - take that you cubicle ridden bitches, 65 and sunny, look how im livin America! - thought I would post the finishing touches of Ray's masterpiece from last night.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Randoms
April Fools Joke of the Day
Thabeet's Facebook Status this morning: "OMG!!! Why Me? SO I Failed Drug Test.. NOt GOIn To Detroit.. MY Boys Do IT for ME!!! fuckin suprise drug test!!! ahhh My Life SUCKS!!!!! damn!" I hate April Fools jokes, but I gotta admit thats a good one. Pretty fucking funny for a guy who barely speaks English.
-I'm hoping Tom Izzo's wife Lupe does something stupid this week so I can title a post "Lupe Fiasco" If not I'll just resort to making Mexican janitor jokes.
-VERY excited for the McDonald's All-American game tonight. Alex Oriakhi is on the East squad and should get some decent minutes, so that's cool. John Wall got left off the team, reportedly because he is a 5th year senior. I think the folks at McDonald's got hold of this VICIOUS dunk that DeQuan Jones threw on him and made up that whole 5th year thing. I cant find a line, but I'll make the East -3.5
-Im sorry, i got nothing today...still too hungover. I should have my fastball back in a couple days once Final Four practices start.
Thabeet's Facebook Status this morning: "OMG!!! Why Me? SO I Failed Drug Test.. NOt GOIn To Detroit.. MY Boys Do IT for ME!!! fuckin suprise drug test!!! ahhh My Life SUCKS!!!!! damn!" I hate April Fools jokes, but I gotta admit thats a good one. Pretty fucking funny for a guy who barely speaks English.
-I'm hoping Tom Izzo's wife Lupe does something stupid this week so I can title a post "Lupe Fiasco" If not I'll just resort to making Mexican janitor jokes.
-VERY excited for the McDonald's All-American game tonight. Alex Oriakhi is on the East squad and should get some decent minutes, so that's cool. John Wall got left off the team, reportedly because he is a 5th year senior. I think the folks at McDonald's got hold of this VICIOUS dunk that DeQuan Jones threw on him and made up that whole 5th year thing. I cant find a line, but I'll make the East -3.5
-Im sorry, i got nothing today...still too hungover. I should have my fastball back in a couple days once Final Four practices start.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Synergy!
Florida guard Nick Calathes announced for the draft today.
Which... gives me the opportunity to post this video of the Florida professor who was stoned out of his mind - more likely tripping, in my professional opinion - and got fired because he filmed his own class and the administration saw it. Really worth the view.
Which... gives me the opportunity to post this video of the Florida professor who was stoned out of his mind - more likely tripping, in my professional opinion - and got fired because he filmed his own class and the administration saw it. Really worth the view.
Actual News!
Amazingly UConn was able to land 6-2 SG Darius Smith from Chicago today...without the help of Josh Nochimson! (presumably). Here's his scouts.com link
I don't know what the coaching staff told him because right now I'd be afraid of next years post-season ban. Oyyy. Anyway, I like players from the Bronx and Chicago when it comes to guards. So I'm excited.
I don't know what the coaching staff told him because right now I'd be afraid of next years post-season ban. Oyyy. Anyway, I like players from the Bronx and Chicago when it comes to guards. So I'm excited.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Michigan St. 64, Louisville 52
Thank god that Detroit looks like this now and no locals have money to buy tickets and root for Michigan St. It's gonna be a virtual homegame...
Also, thanks to Rick Pitino for ordering Louisville to tank so that UConn could have a clear road to the championship game. I guess we beat them so thoroughly earlier this year that Pitino couldn't handle the embarrassment that next week would have brought.
Michigan St. is going to be an ideal matchup. I'm giddy. UConn will probably be a 3or4 point favorite even though the game is in Detroit. Unfortunately Gavin Edwards will probably have to play a lot because Thabeet CAN NOT be allowed to run around with Goran Sutan. Other than that I'm feelin...
so - Final Four next week and the Masters the week after. In honor of those two weeks here are some cart girls from MSU.
Also, thanks to Rick Pitino for ordering Louisville to tank so that UConn could have a clear road to the championship game. I guess we beat them so thoroughly earlier this year that Pitino couldn't handle the embarrassment that next week would have brought.
Michigan St. is going to be an ideal matchup. I'm giddy. UConn will probably be a 3or4 point favorite even though the game is in Detroit. Unfortunately Gavin Edwards will probably have to play a lot because Thabeet CAN NOT be allowed to run around with Goran Sutan. Other than that I'm feelin...
so - Final Four next week and the Masters the week after. In honor of those two weeks here are some cart girls from MSU.
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Ohhhhh Skeet skeet skeet skeet
UCONN 82, MIZZOU 75
An appropriate tribute to what these kids did this week in the face of amazing adversity. Take that, NCAA
That will be all until I can coherently gather my thoughts...
An appropriate tribute to what these kids did this week in the face of amazing adversity. Take that, NCAA
That will be all until I can coherently gather my thoughts...
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Get ya popcorn, er, iPod ready
Tonight is gonna be a music night - I'm muting the TV like Billy Packer is back behind the mic. Cause all you're going to hear about is this Miles/Majok thing. The bright side of things, should you choose to listen to the broadcast, is that Miles/Majok might keep the announcers from telling us that 'aj price's dad tony played at Penn and got to a Final Four' and 'here's gavin edwards, his father earl played in the NFL.' So we got that goin' for us..
Since I've been enrolled at UConn a few crazy things have happened. There was the girl killed in a crosswalk by that drunk dude, the teacher who got shot in the head last year, and a handful of rapes/sexual assaults. There is always a different feeling on campus the day after something like that happens. But yesterday afternoon and today it was like everyone's best friend got raped. It's just a very sad place to be right now...
Also, congratulations to Rocky Mountain College for winning the NAIA Championship last night. To pay homage to their school the players celebrated with these.
Since I've been enrolled at UConn a few crazy things have happened. There was the girl killed in a crosswalk by that drunk dude, the teacher who got shot in the head last year, and a handful of rapes/sexual assaults. There is always a different feeling on campus the day after something like that happens. But yesterday afternoon and today it was like everyone's best friend got raped. It's just a very sad place to be right now...
Also, congratulations to Rocky Mountain College for winning the NAIA Championship last night. To pay homage to their school the players celebrated with these.
I Love AJ Price
The most dynamic scoring point guard in college basketball is a pretty good interview too...
Pedro Gomez: Is it a distraction at all?
AJ: uhh no, not at all.
Gomez: Even having to answer these questions like this that you normally wouldn't have to if this report wasn't out there?
AJ: no not at all. I like it. It gives me more face time. We're here to win games, that's all we care about.
Amen! Yesterday I was quite worried about this indeed being a distraction. Not anymore. If you think that AJ and Jeff Adrien are going to allow this team to lose - you are crazy. If anything I'm more confident in this team now than I was two days ago. Dare I say...
Pedro Gomez: Is it a distraction at all?
AJ: uhh no, not at all.
Gomez: Even having to answer these questions like this that you normally wouldn't have to if this report wasn't out there?
AJ: no not at all. I like it. It gives me more face time. We're here to win games, that's all we care about.
Amen! Yesterday I was quite worried about this indeed being a distraction. Not anymore. If you think that AJ and Jeff Adrien are going to allow this team to lose - you are crazy. If anything I'm more confident in this team now than I was two days ago. Dare I say...
Top Ten Things I Never Thought I'd Say About ESPN Coverage
So I desperately need something to knock this Nate Miles story off the running loop that is all day Sportscenter. Without further delay...
#10 - Ohhh, Spring Training highlights!
#9 - Can Steven A Smith interview someone? i mean COME ON peeeple
#8 - Anyone got a photo of Michael Phelps snorting a line of coke?
#7 - Does Chris Connolly have a tear-jerker piece ready?
#6 - Can Rick Reilly do the Mount Rushmore of Sports again!?
#5 - Can the Yankees overpay someone else?
#4 - how the fuck does Letterman come up with 10 of these things...
#3 - people should really praise Coack K some more
#2 - Bowling should get more air time. That Pete Weber is Dynamic!
#1 - Can we get Brett Favre out of retirement??
ohhhhhh! that's your Top 10. Paul, play me out!
#10 - Ohhh, Spring Training highlights!
#9 - Can Steven A Smith interview someone? i mean COME ON peeeple
#8 - Anyone got a photo of Michael Phelps snorting a line of coke?
#7 - Does Chris Connolly have a tear-jerker piece ready?
#6 - Can Rick Reilly do the Mount Rushmore of Sports again!?
#5 - Can the Yankees overpay someone else?
#4 - how the fuck does Letterman come up with 10 of these things...
#3 - people should really praise Coack K some more
#2 - Bowling should get more air time. That Pete Weber is Dynamic!
#1 - Can we get Brett Favre out of retirement??
ohhhhhh! that's your Top 10. Paul, play me out!
Death by 1000 paper cuts...on my dick
So now Pat Forde reports that Nochimson had his hands all over the Majok deal as well. As much as I hate to hear that, Forde is a really good reporter and does a nice job of putting this issue into context.
I don't get it...Rodney Guillory can somehow charge 10,000 just to get OJ Mayo to visit your school, and multiple coaches pay it - yet USC and the rest of the Pac-10 bagmen don't get in the slightest bit of trouble. But somehow this degenerate wanna be agent is going to blow up the entire UConn program. oyyyy
Over/under: 1.5 days until an active player is linked to Nochimson.
I'll take the under. Nothing gets the media witch hunting faster than blood in the water...
I don't get it...Rodney Guillory can somehow charge 10,000 just to get OJ Mayo to visit your school, and multiple coaches pay it - yet USC and the rest of the Pac-10 bagmen don't get in the slightest bit of trouble. But somehow this degenerate wanna be agent is going to blow up the entire UConn program. oyyyy
Over/under: 1.5 days until an active player is linked to Nochimson.
I'll take the under. Nothing gets the media witch hunting faster than blood in the water...
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
On a Lighter Note...
A few days ago I finally started utilizing Google Analytics. It shows you all kinds of cool stuff like how many people were on your site, from what town, and bunch more I can't even figure out. There is one section that shows the search terms people who got to the site used. One guy today searched " "jim calhoun" + "Asshole" " so, i thought that was awesome. It took the guy to my post a few days ago about jimmy magically re-hydrating, sans IV, by apologist fans licking his asshole. So I hope the guy who searched it got what he was looking for. Or maybe he has a fetish for naked Calhoun pics (none here!), in which case he probably was very disappointed, having thought his white whale had finally been found only to find this non-sense.
Anyway- bad day for the program, but not as bad as I thought it would be. Now all Hathaway has to do is start listening to my spin control...
Anyway- bad day for the program, but not as bad as I thought it would be. Now all Hathaway has to do is start listening to my spin control...
Crisis Management 101
After taking a little while to come out of shock, I have managed to put together what the UConn SID should be distributing to every media outlet. They won't, because they are idiots and prefer the old no comment route. But if Jeff Hathaway had answered my screams from outside his office they could've saved the ship - or at least plugged some holes....
"official" statement: Over his 23 years of service to the University of Connecticut Jim Calhoun has excelled his two main objectives; winning basketball games and forming kids into productive young men. While the notoriety comes from wins, Coach Calhoun's greatest pride comes from taking troubled youth and turning them into men. When at 15 years old Coach lost his father he was basically adopted by his high school basketball coach. When Calhoun left college for manual labor in his hometown, it was that same high school coach who put Calhoun back on the path to higher education and made him a man.
So when Coach sees a person like a Caron Butler, who was arrested 15 times by age 15, he can't help but step in. It's ingrained in Coach because of his own life. After three years at UConn a tearful Caron bid the school adieu and has since set up countless charities and received significant accolades for them, including in 2006 when Sporting News named him to their "Good Guys in Sports" list. Caron would be the first to admit that none of this would have been possible without Jim Calhoun and the UConn family.
Sadly, not every kid that UConn recruits has the family structure and maturity of Emeka Okafor or Craig Austrie. So while there were many calls made to Nate Miles over the course of 2006 and 2007, they were calls to make sure that he was all right. To make sure things were going ok as Nate bounced around from high school to high school, constantly misunderstood and homesick. These were not calls to say - 'hey, come play for UConn.' Not every college coach is ruthless like Lane Kiffin. Some coaches, like Jim Calhoun, are real people. When UConn began recruiting Miles in 2006 they saw a basketball talent - that much is for sure. But they also saw a reclamation project and a kid who needed defending and guidance...because no one else was there to give it to him. If he landed at UConn, awesome. But if he went somewhere else and survived the hand he had been dealt, well, that was what was truly important.
We are all familiar with the Nate Miles saga and how it ended poorly at UConn. What not enough people realize is what Miles has gone through. His mother was an alcoholic and his father was no where to be found. That left Nate to raise his sister by himself. A sister who has cancer. No wonder he went to five different high schools (never kicked out of any, mind you- just homesick, which is tough for a kid who never really had a home.)
Jim Calhoun and UConn were going to provide the home Nate and his little sister needed. The phone calls need to be looked at in the bigger scheme of things. Nate committed to UConn in 2006, so it makes no sense that the program would have been still making "recruiting calls" in 2007. The program cared about him, and now, sadly, they may be punished.
This real issue here is another big time agent wannabe who STOLE A MILLION BUCKS FROM RIP is the crux of this Yahoo story. He went to school here and was on the absolute bottom of the team totem-pole, but that didn't keep him from using this "connection" to deceive others. He tricked Richard Hamilton, and tricking Nate Miles wasn't very difficult. The kid was vulnerable and looking for guidance. Add in a guardian in Sean Patterson who was in it for the money, and Josh Nochimson had an easy target. He is the real criminal here, and the one who should be targeted.
Other thoughts
-ok, so that got a little sloppy, but that would be the gist of my crisis management, not this bullshit UConn put out today. Hathaway - what a clown. The statement only covers their ass because Miles never played, so the NCAA can't take away any of our wins, etc. Just like the Not a Dime Back thing, Hathaway completely fails to come out and say Calhoun is our man and we stand by him. Just terrible. This is the kind of thing that is gonna agitate the old man right out of Storrs. He doesn't need this garbage from a university that owes everything it has to him.
-also, total bullshit hack ass journalism by Yahoo sports. According to the Uconn statement the responded to a yahoo FOI request in the fall, and they waited to pull it out now. This is some CBS Dan Rather/George W 2004 election stuff. If you want to be taken seriously as a journalist you cant do it by publishing ambushes.
"official" statement: Over his 23 years of service to the University of Connecticut Jim Calhoun has excelled his two main objectives; winning basketball games and forming kids into productive young men. While the notoriety comes from wins, Coach Calhoun's greatest pride comes from taking troubled youth and turning them into men. When at 15 years old Coach lost his father he was basically adopted by his high school basketball coach. When Calhoun left college for manual labor in his hometown, it was that same high school coach who put Calhoun back on the path to higher education and made him a man.
So when Coach sees a person like a Caron Butler, who was arrested 15 times by age 15, he can't help but step in. It's ingrained in Coach because of his own life. After three years at UConn a tearful Caron bid the school adieu and has since set up countless charities and received significant accolades for them, including in 2006 when Sporting News named him to their "Good Guys in Sports" list. Caron would be the first to admit that none of this would have been possible without Jim Calhoun and the UConn family.
Sadly, not every kid that UConn recruits has the family structure and maturity of Emeka Okafor or Craig Austrie. So while there were many calls made to Nate Miles over the course of 2006 and 2007, they were calls to make sure that he was all right. To make sure things were going ok as Nate bounced around from high school to high school, constantly misunderstood and homesick. These were not calls to say - 'hey, come play for UConn.' Not every college coach is ruthless like Lane Kiffin. Some coaches, like Jim Calhoun, are real people. When UConn began recruiting Miles in 2006 they saw a basketball talent - that much is for sure. But they also saw a reclamation project and a kid who needed defending and guidance...because no one else was there to give it to him. If he landed at UConn, awesome. But if he went somewhere else and survived the hand he had been dealt, well, that was what was truly important.
We are all familiar with the Nate Miles saga and how it ended poorly at UConn. What not enough people realize is what Miles has gone through. His mother was an alcoholic and his father was no where to be found. That left Nate to raise his sister by himself. A sister who has cancer. No wonder he went to five different high schools (never kicked out of any, mind you- just homesick, which is tough for a kid who never really had a home.)
Jim Calhoun and UConn were going to provide the home Nate and his little sister needed. The phone calls need to be looked at in the bigger scheme of things. Nate committed to UConn in 2006, so it makes no sense that the program would have been still making "recruiting calls" in 2007. The program cared about him, and now, sadly, they may be punished.
This real issue here is another big time agent wannabe who STOLE A MILLION BUCKS FROM RIP is the crux of this Yahoo story. He went to school here and was on the absolute bottom of the team totem-pole, but that didn't keep him from using this "connection" to deceive others. He tricked Richard Hamilton, and tricking Nate Miles wasn't very difficult. The kid was vulnerable and looking for guidance. Add in a guardian in Sean Patterson who was in it for the money, and Josh Nochimson had an easy target. He is the real criminal here, and the one who should be targeted.
Other thoughts
-ok, so that got a little sloppy, but that would be the gist of my crisis management, not this bullshit UConn put out today. Hathaway - what a clown. The statement only covers their ass because Miles never played, so the NCAA can't take away any of our wins, etc. Just like the Not a Dime Back thing, Hathaway completely fails to come out and say Calhoun is our man and we stand by him. Just terrible. This is the kind of thing that is gonna agitate the old man right out of Storrs. He doesn't need this garbage from a university that owes everything it has to him.
-also, total bullshit hack ass journalism by Yahoo sports. According to the Uconn statement the responded to a yahoo FOI request in the fall, and they waited to pull it out now. This is some CBS Dan Rather/George W 2004 election stuff. If you want to be taken seriously as a journalist you cant do it by publishing ambushes.
Kelvin Sampson is Laughing
From ESPN.com
Connecticut potentially committed NCAA rules violations in its recruitment of former guard Nate Miles, Yahoo Sports reported Wednesday.
The Web site reported that according to multiple sources, between 2006 and 2008, Miles was provided with lodging, transportation, restaurant meals and representation by Josh Nochimson, a former UConn student manager who had become a professional sports agent and formerly represented ex-Huskies star Richard Hamilton.
The program may also have exceeded the number of phone calls allowed to Miles under NCAA regulations during its recruiting, Yahoo Sports reported, citing phone records obtained under the Freedom of Information Act.
The NCAA allows a single phone call per month to a prospect or his family in a player's junior year of high school. Yahoo Sports reported that according to records, UConn coaches exceeded that limit over several months in 2006 and 2007 in the program's recruitment of Miles. In December of 2006 alone, former UConn assistant coach Tom Moore made 27 calls to Miles' guardian and a person Miles referred to as an uncle as well as three calls to Miles.
The Web site also reported that Moore, currently the coach at Quinnipiac, made Nochimson aware that UConn was recruiting Miles and that he knew Nochimson and Miles had talked.
According to records obtained by Yahoo Sports, over a two-year period, five different UConn coaches traded at least 1,565 phone and text messages with Nochimson, including 16 from coach Jim Calhoun.
Nochimson has moved to decertify himself as an agent after Hamilton fired him and accused him of stealing more than $1 million from him, according to the report.
My Quick First Take: I have no problem with them taking care of Nate Miles. He was essentially a homeless kid who went to at least 5 different high schools and had to support the family his parents refused to.
But as a program we are fucked. This is the kind of stuff that gets you serious penalties - look at Indiana this year. Worse it gives fuel for all those Calhoun haters and it's gonna be front page news for some time. At least Tom Moore seems to have been a big part of this and he's gone. So thanks for that, but this looks BAD. even i cant sugarcoat this one. Just when i start feeling great about this team, this happens. Forget this year, we could be in serious trouble for the next 2-3 years if all charge are as true and bad as they sound.
Connecticut potentially committed NCAA rules violations in its recruitment of former guard Nate Miles, Yahoo Sports reported Wednesday.
The Web site reported that according to multiple sources, between 2006 and 2008, Miles was provided with lodging, transportation, restaurant meals and representation by Josh Nochimson, a former UConn student manager who had become a professional sports agent and formerly represented ex-Huskies star Richard Hamilton.
The program may also have exceeded the number of phone calls allowed to Miles under NCAA regulations during its recruiting, Yahoo Sports reported, citing phone records obtained under the Freedom of Information Act.
The NCAA allows a single phone call per month to a prospect or his family in a player's junior year of high school. Yahoo Sports reported that according to records, UConn coaches exceeded that limit over several months in 2006 and 2007 in the program's recruitment of Miles. In December of 2006 alone, former UConn assistant coach Tom Moore made 27 calls to Miles' guardian and a person Miles referred to as an uncle as well as three calls to Miles.
The Web site also reported that Moore, currently the coach at Quinnipiac, made Nochimson aware that UConn was recruiting Miles and that he knew Nochimson and Miles had talked.
According to records obtained by Yahoo Sports, over a two-year period, five different UConn coaches traded at least 1,565 phone and text messages with Nochimson, including 16 from coach Jim Calhoun.
Nochimson has moved to decertify himself as an agent after Hamilton fired him and accused him of stealing more than $1 million from him, according to the report.
My Quick First Take: I have no problem with them taking care of Nate Miles. He was essentially a homeless kid who went to at least 5 different high schools and had to support the family his parents refused to.
But as a program we are fucked. This is the kind of stuff that gets you serious penalties - look at Indiana this year. Worse it gives fuel for all those Calhoun haters and it's gonna be front page news for some time. At least Tom Moore seems to have been a big part of this and he's gone. So thanks for that, but this looks BAD. even i cant sugarcoat this one. Just when i start feeling great about this team, this happens. Forget this year, we could be in serious trouble for the next 2-3 years if all charge are as true and bad as they sound.
My Apology to the UConn Cheerleaders
I was gonna steal a page from Red's Army and do a little opponent cheerleader advance scouting, but I've been left horrified. While I stand by my statements from earlier that UConn cheerleaders are jacked, at least they have hot faces. The Purdue Boilermaker cheerleaders look like boiler makers. It's really terrible. I looked at each of their pictures and couldn't find anything. But I had to choose one. Make sure you read her ambitious Career Goals while you're there.
Hopefully Missouri or Memphis can bring something better to the table in the Elite "Don't Call Me Great" Eight.
Hopefully Missouri or Memphis can bring something better to the table in the Elite "Don't Call Me Great" Eight.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
What Happened?!?!
One week ago UConn was the team that wasn't even supposed to be a #1 seed. Now that they've annihilated Chattanooga and Texas AM, the epitome of hick schools, everyone has been licking Jim Calhoun's dehydrated asshole (that's how he re-hydrates. who needs an I.V. when you have an entire state full of apologist fans - myself included)
What the pundits are saying...
Jay Bilas: UConn is the #1 seed most likely to win the national championship.
Dick Vitale: "UConn is playing the best basketball right now." ESPN, Mike and Mike
Andy Katz: "I Love Brisket! Hey, waitress, another round of full sour pickles for all my friends!"
Bob Knight: "Is this a turtleneck?? I'm a V-neck guy goddammit (throws folding chair across wardrobe room) everybody knows that"
Coaches Say...
Jim Boeheim: "UConn would be almost unbeatable if Jerome Dyson was healthy." -ESPN, The Herd 3/23
Todd Says...Thanks, Jim. Imagine how good we wouldv'e been if UConn's Board of Trustee's was as flexible on athletes who abuse women as the Syracuse Trustees are. I don't think we'd have seen six overtimes if Nate was here or Devo was gone.
But.....
Some things never change. Digger Phelps on Monday told ESPN Radio that he like Missouri to beat Memphis AND Connecticut. This comes as a shock because usually Digger is soooo pro-UConn...
What the pundits are saying...
Jay Bilas: UConn is the #1 seed most likely to win the national championship.
Dick Vitale: "UConn is playing the best basketball right now." ESPN, Mike and Mike
Andy Katz: "I Love Brisket! Hey, waitress, another round of full sour pickles for all my friends!"
Bob Knight: "Is this a turtleneck?? I'm a V-neck guy goddammit (throws folding chair across wardrobe room) everybody knows that"
Coaches Say...
Jim Boeheim: "UConn would be almost unbeatable if Jerome Dyson was healthy." -ESPN, The Herd 3/23
Todd Says...Thanks, Jim. Imagine how good we wouldv'e been if UConn's Board of Trustee's was as flexible on athletes who abuse women as the Syracuse Trustees are. I don't think we'd have seen six overtimes if Nate was here or Devo was gone.
But.....
Some things never change. Digger Phelps on Monday told ESPN Radio that he like Missouri to beat Memphis AND Connecticut. This comes as a shock because usually Digger is soooo pro-UConn...
We're no UCLA
I figured I needed some entertaining filler now that I'm on a mission to post multiple times a day, so my plan was to post some UConn cheerleader pictures. Oyyyyy...good from far, but far from good. This is the problem you run into at a cold weather school. First, all the football games are played in the freezing cold, and no one wants to see pictures of chicks in windsuits. But the windsuits might be preferable to the pictures I found from basketball games. Good god - these girls are Jacked! I mean, significantly stonger than me - which is more of a reflection on me being a pussy who eschews gyms than it is a statement about them, but still. Just disgusting... Apparently Debbie Clemens wasn't the only woman out there doing HGH to look more muscular. It's like the Chappelle routine about AIDS coming from a monkey. You can't fuck a monkey cause, "as soon as ya got close it'd snap your dick off and throw it in the tall weeds, never to be seen again" I'm pretty sure that's how the guys dating these sasquatchs feel.
And so it only took me until 9:30 today for my daily 'punch in the balls because I go to a cold weather school.'
While the UConn Cheerleaders may have let you down, I promise not to do the same. So here is some of the Mansfield areas best talent
And so it only took me until 9:30 today for my daily 'punch in the balls because I go to a cold weather school.'
While the UConn Cheerleaders may have let you down, I promise not to do the same. So here is some of the Mansfield areas best talent
Making Moves
DId you see that!?! Three posts yesterday! I am back on the wagon - at least until this blog becomes irrelevant in three weeks. But until then I am banging posts out like an all day porn shoot. It's finally March Madness and I'm reinvigorated. Quality will not be an issue. Unlike a porn star I promise not to fake it. It's on. Multiple posts every day - enjoy that cubiclers! Let's go. Throw the ball up...
Monday, March 23, 2009
Toolzie 2.0
Remember the Shammon Tooles inbound pass that lost UConn the game at Miami back in the day? Well, this is the worst thing I've seen since..
Fast forward to 1:35 for the money shot, err step.
Fast forward to 1:35 for the money shot, err step.
I wish Washington had beat Purdue...
...Cause I really wanted to post this video. Seeing how I had my heart set on it, and I'm in love with this new Jordan campaign, here goes anyway. Listen for Sean McDonough hitting the high notes like Gus Johnson..."Hammmilllton....HAAAAMMMMILLLLTONNNN!" This was before Jerry Remy sucked the life out of poor Sean...
Take that, Kevin Pittsnogle!
I LOVE these "Where are they now" segments. How else are you going to find out Todd MacCulloch - of Dave Chappelle's Reparations skit fame ("all the black players quit, leaving Todd MacCulloch to play one on one with Travis Knight.") is now on the Pro Pinball Circuit, and ranked #178 in the world. Shocking stuff, right? Not close to as shocking as finding out that TODD MACCULLOCH MADE 35 MILLION DOLLARS IN THE NBA. THIRTY FIVE MILLION. TODD MACCULLOCH. anyways...
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Post post: I just threw that up there before i watched the segment, knowing it would be hilarious. my first thought was, "wow, he looks fat!" then he gets done with his practice session and walks upstairs to his personal 7-11 slurpee machine. i want to say more, but fear detracting from the absurd unintentional comedy that ensues.
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Post post: I just threw that up there before i watched the segment, knowing it would be hilarious. my first thought was, "wow, he looks fat!" then he gets done with his practice session and walks upstairs to his personal 7-11 slurpee machine. i want to say more, but fear detracting from the absurd unintentional comedy that ensues.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Jesus!
I'm a total sucker for these new Jordan commercials...and I won't even hold it against Ray that his tremendous effort tonight against the Spurs kept me from going undefeated today.
As I ruminated earlier, Jimmy is just fine. Out of the hospital and back with the team, even doing a funny press conference this afternoon. I liked our region before, but now that he's gotten sick like in 1999 and 2004 I like our Final Four chances even more. I would like to apologize to Marcus Williams, Rudy Gay, Josh Boone, et al for blaming the outcome in 2006 on them. Turned out the missing link was Jimmy's "dehydration."
As I ruminated earlier, Jimmy is just fine. Out of the hospital and back with the team, even doing a funny press conference this afternoon. I liked our region before, but now that he's gotten sick like in 1999 and 2004 I like our Final Four chances even more. I would like to apologize to Marcus Williams, Rudy Gay, Josh Boone, et al for blaming the outcome in 2006 on them. Turned out the missing link was Jimmy's "dehydration."
Dont worry about Jimmy C
I for one am not worried about Jimmy and his hospital stay. The man has beat cancer three times. He drinks chemo for breakfast, the man is a tour de force. Plus, I really like the way the team plays when Calhoun is sick/ejected. The play is a lot smoother under Blaney because no one is afraid of the short leash. Tremendous win yesterday, unless you had the under, and I'm looking for another solid win tomorrow.
On a personal note, I went 14-2 yesterday, tying my best bracket start ever. Too bad I couldn't translate that to the gambling ledger...
On a personal note, I went 14-2 yesterday, tying my best bracket start ever. Too bad I couldn't translate that to the gambling ledger...
Monday, March 16, 2009
Leit-off
Dave Leitao "resigned" at Virginia today. Virginia AD Craig Littlepage is an Uncle Tom (can Dave Leitao, as a half black, half white guy still call Craig Littlepage an Uncle Tom? I'm thinking yes...).
Calhoun apprentices seem to suffer from what I'm calling The Belicheck Corollary. Karl Hobbs, Tom Moore, and Leitao have pretty much gone the way of Charlie Weiss, Eric Mangina and Romeo Crenell. Too bad.
Leitao has a career record of 63-60, despite going 10-18 in 2008-09 and having a 4-24 year at Northeastern in 1995-96. 10-18 is indefensible, but he should have gotten another year.
Calhoun apprentices seem to suffer from what I'm calling The Belicheck Corollary. Karl Hobbs, Tom Moore, and Leitao have pretty much gone the way of Charlie Weiss, Eric Mangina and Romeo Crenell. Too bad.
Leitao has a career record of 63-60, despite going 10-18 in 2008-09 and having a 4-24 year at Northeastern in 1995-96. 10-18 is indefensible, but he should have gotten another year.
Friday, March 13, 2009
The Epic - Live Blog
Uconn v Syracuse
-A couple quick thoughts before the tip. The video montage ESPN plays before the games reminded me of a couple things. 1-that shot by Brandin Knight came really, really close to going in. 2- Ray's floater in the Allen/Allen game still gives me goosebumps. 3- Stanley must still be embarrassed by the way Joe Alexander (white guy) threw it in his face last year.
-Also, DeJuan Blair is a fat sack of shit. That effort by Pitt was costly. The only solace I take from it is how much easier it just got to win the tournament.
-Also, James Harden is by far the best NBA prospect in college. Anyone who takes Blake "Mini-Boozer" Griffin over Harden is a fool. Griffin's athleticism is what allows him to dominate the weak Big12, but that doesn't translate to the NBA where everyone is a freak. I have absolutely fallen in love with Harden. He's Baron Davis - it's just tremendous.
First Half
20:00 - Bob Donato and John Cahill on the game. Good by me, for now.
-Calhoun had said earlier in the week that Haralson (?!?!?!) might get the start over Austrie, but he opted to go with Kemba and move AJ to the 2. I like that.
19:50 - Raff: "Hey Sean, he's killin me! And Jay, 2-3 zone with some man-to-man principles!"
19:40 - McDonough: "Syracuse in the Digger Phelps orange highlighter uniforms tonight."
13:40 - Does anything kill more possessions at the college level than alley-oop attempts? This annoys me to no end.
12:10 - Haralson checks in. He runs like Greg Oden, which is not a good thing. Add that he's 19 and yet severely balding and Scottie Haralson is the Benjamin Button of college basketball. He is calling for the ball and looks aggressive for the first time all year, so maybe he can contribute. Were going to need it against the zone.
11:46 - And the ball goes flying through Haralson's hands and out of bounds. Nice call, Todd.
11:27 - You cannot make this shit up: McDonough: "Gavin Edwards trots in, His dad Earl Edwards played in the NFL for 11 years." It's like the sun coming up in the morning...
7:43 - Stanley with the breakaway windmill!
Raftery (apoplectic): "There's a lot of neighborhoods in New York, but this is Mr. Robinsons! Send it in!"
-Stanley even got back on D and attempted to draw the charge. His energy has been excellent tonight. Going to need that...
5:43 - Also, did you know that AJ Price's father Tony played for Penn? And that they went to the final four in 1979? Really, you never heard that before?
0:33 - Andy Rautins father played at Syracuse and McDonough used to get tea-bagged by him. Now that we've covered all the players with basketball parents we can have a clean second half.
0:15 - Price scores to put UConn up 37-34 at the half. Raftery: "Price, on-the-money-with-that-delivery!"
Second Half:
19:10 - AJ scores on a breakaway and forces up a stupid foul from Paul Harris. CRACKHEAD, CRACKHEAD, CRACKHEAD!
17:28 - Stanley throws down his third alley-oop of the game. That's 13 for him, Uconn leads 44-40. Raftery: "Robinson, the-elevator-man!"
16:05 - Shit. AJ picks up his third. I'd like to see him back between 10:00 and 8:00 depending on the score. It is MSG though, so I've got faith in Kemba. Never bet against a city kid in the Garden.
14:19 - WOW - AJ back already. I mean, Kemba had one bad possession, but I would've let him go some more...but I'm not in the Hall of Fame like Jimmy.
11:30 - For a gang-banging punk, Gerry McNamara sure ended up with a pretty hot white chick.
10:58 - Stanley with another vicious dunk as I do my best Kemba Walker screaming and chest hitting impersonation in my living room.
Raftery: "He brought Adrien with him! Yo, Adrien!"
10:34 - Craig Austrie shouldn't be allowed to shoot anymore. At least Stanley has confidence tonight -let him shoot.
9:52 - Nine blocks for UConn so far - take that Mississippi State! Erick Dampier isn't walking through that door.
8:24 - Onganaut took it hard at Stanley and you could see him have flashbacks to Joe Alexander as Stanley went for the block. Astronaut makes the free throws and its tied.
7:52 - Rautins and his fag-hawk make a three putting the Cuse up 54-51. This is very disconcerting. When it seems like you're killing a team all night and can't get any separation...that's generally not good.
7:34 - Craig with a huge three! what does he think this is - Quinnipiac??
6:01 - Terrible play by Craig, gives up a wide open jumper from the elbow in favor of getting stuck in the air and making a terrible pass that ends up in the front row.
5:46 - Stanley needs to start making some fucking free throws...
3:56 - Syracuse pushes to it's largest lead. My purchase of more bourbon earlier today is starting to look pretty savvy, this is depressing.
2:56 - Stanley continues to play his ass off. Fouled, at line down 5 - what are the chances these go ...Oh! There's one! ...misses the second but Thabeet with board and its to the line as both teams in double bonus - favors Uconn big time.
-makes em both - we got a pulse! down only 2!!
2:25 - AJ airballs a set play from out of bounds, Stanley - who else- with a huge board and put back! It's tied! ohhhhhh Skeet skeet skeet!
-They just put Stanley name on fire, ala 90's NBA Jam, during the timeout.
2:10 - Stupid foul on Kemba - free throws. God dammit thats bad
McDonough - "Devendorf is one of those point guard who keeps both teams in the game" He's like a white Edgar Sosa.
1:42 - AJ FORCED THE SHIT OUT IT! Terrible shot FUCK ME
1:02 - CRAIGGGGGGG hits the three to make it 67-68.
Raftery: "Austrie with the early onions!"
0:49 - AHHH nooooo. Awful tripping call on Price. Devo makes them both for 70-67.
0:29 - Thabeet with spinning bucket in traffic. 70-69. We've done a nice job beating the press with Adrien or Stanley slashing to the top of the key and finding Thabeet in Adrien's case or Stanley taking the elbow jumper. So we got that going for us, which is nice.
0:27 - Edwards intentional foul on Astronaut. He sucks from the line...misses the first! Only one guy on the line for Cuse- wierd...makes the second 71-69
0:01 - TERRIBLE possession but Kemba gets the loose ball put back! 71-71. Never bet against a city kid in the Garden
0:00 - Devo made it. NO NO NO it's gonna be called off. I told you John Cahill was a good ref! 5 more minutes baby and how hard is it if you're Syracuse to rally from that and play. wow
OT
4:27 - Astronaut fouls out. Lots of guys on the verge - Fouls, sadly, will determine the outcome.
4:12 - Thabeet on the floor! way to sell out big fella! channeling my inner Billy Raff
3:19 - Harris draws the And-1 on Stanley. You crack smoking motherfucker. 75-74
2:53 - Jeffrey with the long jumper. my reaction : No no no! (scores) Yes yes yes!
1:56 - Devo hits Adrien on the break like he thought Jeffrey was a woman. AWFUL no -call. He was right in Mike Donato's grill and NOTHING.
1:23 - MR ROBINSON'S NEIGHBORHOOD! 80-76 as Stanley nails a three
1:06 - Raftery: "A lot of intestinal fortitude from-both-clubs!"
0:37- another terrible possession that ends in AJ chucking something a mile in the air. Not good. Very un-Uconn like the way our crunch time plays have run tonight.
-consider me petrified with a one point lead and Cuse ball...
0:15- great look by Cuse with Rautins straight on. Good contest by Stanley, got the board, but got fouled and he cant shoot....not out of the woods yet. Stanley 1of2
0:5 - tied game...
AHHHHHHH awful look by Kemba- use your speed to get to the hole! christ!
Double OT
5:00 - by the way, are you fucking kidding me with this game...?!!?
-Last double OT'er i remember was that Brandin Knight game i mentioned earlier
-Doesnt fatigue have to catch up with the Cuse on the second night.
4:09 - terrible foul by Adrien. Concede the basket and move on. Idiot
-everyone on the floor for UCOnn has 4 fouls except Kemba....Oyyyy
3:33 - Harris misses easy breakaway layup. He must be high on crack...
3:11 - Gavin sucks.
2:40 - AJ makes one, 84-83
1:58 - Donato with what I admit is a bad call on Devo. That's a no call. I heard the whistle and thought it was on Craig...He makes both free throws, 86-83
1:43 - Jeffrey with bitch ass foul on Flynn. 86-86
1:18 - Onauku fouls out - Thabeet makes 1of2 - 87-86
0:57 - stupid reach foul on Austrie. Not thinking. 1of2, 87's
3OT
-are you fucking kidding me???
-that Arby's commercial totally just kicked my munchies into full gear...
4:37 - AJ motherfuckin Price - 90-87
3:49 - Thabeet at the line, makes 1of2 - ya gotta try to win this game in the first two-three minutes - everyone is so tired its possible. 91-87
3:!2 - the Price is Right! 93-87. Thats almost like a three possession game. Legs are so tired at this point that it's gonna be very hard to make long shots.
2:59 - Stanley fouls out. I saw a walk on Rautins, and a turnover, but not a foul. Im not sure about that. Great night for Stanley though. He was the only guy on the floor who outplayed Raftery, who had a great game. 2of2 93-89
2:54 - AHHH my god! Awful job by Kemba. Turnover on the press and foul on Jeffrey (4). So no clock and its 93-91.
2:53 - Instant Karma's gonna get you, its gonna knock you right off your feet. Devo tick tack on AJ. 2of2 -95-91
2:39 - Rautins can have that long three for the rest of the game...
2:03 - Jeffrey on the put back 97-91
1:37 - great body control by Thabeet on the drive by Harris. Ill give those two points. 97-93
1:00 - Jeff chokes the ball away, easy breakaway dunk for Harris. 97-95. Harris walked, but were in MSG so NBA rules apply. Five steps for everybody!
0:53 - Jeffrey at the line - 0of2 but Kemba get the board - he has had some HUGE offensive boards tonight.
0:25 - Craig misses a three, but gets his own board! out to AJ and he's fouled
0:21 - NO NO NO - AJ misses first FT....makes second
-Rautins drains a long three and UCONN decides to run more horrible last second offense. Long three by AJ and OT here we go again
4OT -
Seriously though...what the fuck
4:24 - with four himself Thabeet draws the charge on Jackson, thats five, SEE ya!
3:51 - Thabeet throws the crackhead out of the way, thats 5 on him. At least we have more depth..???... 17, 14, 6 in 53 minutes
-Harris ties the game at the line, 100's
3:30 - AJ is a killer...102-100
3:12 - No thabeet and the middle is wide open... 102's
2:50 - Kemba's three just looked like one of my shots. lots of glass, no good
0:38 - how did johnny flynn miss that?? 104's, uconn ball. lets see if we can run something other than a last second deep three...
0:00 - hahahahaha ohhh man, lets just call it a tie.
5OT - first of the year in NCAA
-we have big trouble without Thabeet. I thought AJ made the floater. How in the hell did Harris miss those. And great great great no call by the Refs. just tremendous.
3:20 - AJ makes the jumper 106-104 Raftery: "He's got legs, hes got ONIONS!"
2:01 - Devo fouls out reaching on AJ. He walks over to the bench and punches the water girl in the face. Cuse replace him with a walk-on. Watch, He'll proly make the game winner now...
-AJ 2of2 from line , 108-104
1:40 - Craig lays out a red carpet for Flynn. 108-106
-Commercial for Snickers. Never seen it before. Patrick Ewing dunks on a guy, his nickname is "Patrick Chewing" - which i believe was also his nickname in the court documents from the Gold Club case.
0:59 - Gavin fouls out - Flynn at the line with 2 to tie. Scottie Haralson back in.
Flynn 2of2 - 108's - 6OT anyone??
SCOTTIE HARALSON!!!! 110-108
0:20 ahhhhh no he picks up the foul on Flynn. They are still playing Flynn the same way off the high screen, funneling him to the hoop...excpet Thabeet isn't there anymore! gahhhh - 2of2 - 110's
0:15 - Time, Uconn - get to the hole!
noooooooo come on, another horrible shot by AJ from three. you have no legs, youve played like two games, everyone is in foul trouble. drive the fucking ball. again and again and again- im losing my mind watching this.
6 OT
-I hope you had the over....
this game is going to be decided by walk-ons. Jimmy Veronick posting up Justin Thomas, just watch.
4:50 - how does andy rautins do it? 110-113
2:34 - game. fuck. Harris got Singler'ed by the rim, got it back and got fouled. Not good. 118-112
2:!4- George Blaney jsut picked his nose.
0:00 - Im bummed, but i feel terrible for the team. this is gonna be tough to come back from. if we get through the second round ill be pretty pleased. they never stopped playing hard
-cuse was 24of28 from FT in OT crazy
Post-Game
-Next week = San Diego 2.0 anyone? I'm so disgusted right now, particularly because I think we played pretty damn well, and still lost. It ceased to even be a game after the second OT - it just became a war of attrition through fouls.
What's most saddening is the big picture on this year. I mean it's almost worse than 2006 because these kids are so easy to like. Just a great team of great players and this is what we get. And all these North Carolina doppelgangers talk about how good they could be if they had Zoeller and Ginyard all year. They all conveniently forget that we could be trotting out Nate Miles (zone killing shooter we've missed since Rashad), Majok (Jimmy says he'd be playing 20-25minutes), and The Chuckwagon (supposedly playing much better since going academically ineligible). Oh, and Jerome dyson. Just a terribly upsetting game and you get the feeling that it's going to be that kind of postseason.
Oh, and the worst part - now you wont be able to turn on the TV all day tomorrow without seeing clips of this game.
But- at least we padded our block total. so we can still recruit big men with that nice stat.
-A couple quick thoughts before the tip. The video montage ESPN plays before the games reminded me of a couple things. 1-that shot by Brandin Knight came really, really close to going in. 2- Ray's floater in the Allen/Allen game still gives me goosebumps. 3- Stanley must still be embarrassed by the way Joe Alexander (white guy) threw it in his face last year.
-Also, DeJuan Blair is a fat sack of shit. That effort by Pitt was costly. The only solace I take from it is how much easier it just got to win the tournament.
-Also, James Harden is by far the best NBA prospect in college. Anyone who takes Blake "Mini-Boozer" Griffin over Harden is a fool. Griffin's athleticism is what allows him to dominate the weak Big12, but that doesn't translate to the NBA where everyone is a freak. I have absolutely fallen in love with Harden. He's Baron Davis - it's just tremendous.
First Half
20:00 - Bob Donato and John Cahill on the game. Good by me, for now.
-Calhoun had said earlier in the week that Haralson (?!?!?!) might get the start over Austrie, but he opted to go with Kemba and move AJ to the 2. I like that.
19:50 - Raff: "Hey Sean, he's killin me! And Jay, 2-3 zone with some man-to-man principles!"
19:40 - McDonough: "Syracuse in the Digger Phelps orange highlighter uniforms tonight."
13:40 - Does anything kill more possessions at the college level than alley-oop attempts? This annoys me to no end.
12:10 - Haralson checks in. He runs like Greg Oden, which is not a good thing. Add that he's 19 and yet severely balding and Scottie Haralson is the Benjamin Button of college basketball. He is calling for the ball and looks aggressive for the first time all year, so maybe he can contribute. Were going to need it against the zone.
11:46 - And the ball goes flying through Haralson's hands and out of bounds. Nice call, Todd.
11:27 - You cannot make this shit up: McDonough: "Gavin Edwards trots in, His dad Earl Edwards played in the NFL for 11 years." It's like the sun coming up in the morning...
7:43 - Stanley with the breakaway windmill!
Raftery (apoplectic): "There's a lot of neighborhoods in New York, but this is Mr. Robinsons! Send it in!"
-Stanley even got back on D and attempted to draw the charge. His energy has been excellent tonight. Going to need that...
5:43 - Also, did you know that AJ Price's father Tony played for Penn? And that they went to the final four in 1979? Really, you never heard that before?
0:33 - Andy Rautins father played at Syracuse and McDonough used to get tea-bagged by him. Now that we've covered all the players with basketball parents we can have a clean second half.
0:15 - Price scores to put UConn up 37-34 at the half. Raftery: "Price, on-the-money-with-that-delivery!"
Second Half:
19:10 - AJ scores on a breakaway and forces up a stupid foul from Paul Harris. CRACKHEAD, CRACKHEAD, CRACKHEAD!
17:28 - Stanley throws down his third alley-oop of the game. That's 13 for him, Uconn leads 44-40. Raftery: "Robinson, the-elevator-man!"
16:05 - Shit. AJ picks up his third. I'd like to see him back between 10:00 and 8:00 depending on the score. It is MSG though, so I've got faith in Kemba. Never bet against a city kid in the Garden.
14:19 - WOW - AJ back already. I mean, Kemba had one bad possession, but I would've let him go some more...but I'm not in the Hall of Fame like Jimmy.
11:30 - For a gang-banging punk, Gerry McNamara sure ended up with a pretty hot white chick.
10:58 - Stanley with another vicious dunk as I do my best Kemba Walker screaming and chest hitting impersonation in my living room.
Raftery: "He brought Adrien with him! Yo, Adrien!"
10:34 - Craig Austrie shouldn't be allowed to shoot anymore. At least Stanley has confidence tonight -let him shoot.
9:52 - Nine blocks for UConn so far - take that Mississippi State! Erick Dampier isn't walking through that door.
8:24 - Onganaut took it hard at Stanley and you could see him have flashbacks to Joe Alexander as Stanley went for the block. Astronaut makes the free throws and its tied.
7:52 - Rautins and his fag-hawk make a three putting the Cuse up 54-51. This is very disconcerting. When it seems like you're killing a team all night and can't get any separation...that's generally not good.
7:34 - Craig with a huge three! what does he think this is - Quinnipiac??
6:01 - Terrible play by Craig, gives up a wide open jumper from the elbow in favor of getting stuck in the air and making a terrible pass that ends up in the front row.
5:46 - Stanley needs to start making some fucking free throws...
3:56 - Syracuse pushes to it's largest lead. My purchase of more bourbon earlier today is starting to look pretty savvy, this is depressing.
2:56 - Stanley continues to play his ass off. Fouled, at line down 5 - what are the chances these go ...Oh! There's one! ...misses the second but Thabeet with board and its to the line as both teams in double bonus - favors Uconn big time.
-makes em both - we got a pulse! down only 2!!
2:25 - AJ airballs a set play from out of bounds, Stanley - who else- with a huge board and put back! It's tied! ohhhhhh Skeet skeet skeet!
-They just put Stanley name on fire, ala 90's NBA Jam, during the timeout.
2:10 - Stupid foul on Kemba - free throws. God dammit thats bad
McDonough - "Devendorf is one of those point guard who keeps both teams in the game" He's like a white Edgar Sosa.
1:42 - AJ FORCED THE SHIT OUT IT! Terrible shot FUCK ME
1:02 - CRAIGGGGGGG hits the three to make it 67-68.
Raftery: "Austrie with the early onions!"
0:49 - AHHH nooooo. Awful tripping call on Price. Devo makes them both for 70-67.
0:29 - Thabeet with spinning bucket in traffic. 70-69. We've done a nice job beating the press with Adrien or Stanley slashing to the top of the key and finding Thabeet in Adrien's case or Stanley taking the elbow jumper. So we got that going for us, which is nice.
0:27 - Edwards intentional foul on Astronaut. He sucks from the line...misses the first! Only one guy on the line for Cuse- wierd...makes the second 71-69
0:01 - TERRIBLE possession but Kemba gets the loose ball put back! 71-71. Never bet against a city kid in the Garden
0:00 - Devo made it. NO NO NO it's gonna be called off. I told you John Cahill was a good ref! 5 more minutes baby and how hard is it if you're Syracuse to rally from that and play. wow
OT
4:27 - Astronaut fouls out. Lots of guys on the verge - Fouls, sadly, will determine the outcome.
4:12 - Thabeet on the floor! way to sell out big fella! channeling my inner Billy Raff
3:19 - Harris draws the And-1 on Stanley. You crack smoking motherfucker. 75-74
2:53 - Jeffrey with the long jumper. my reaction : No no no! (scores) Yes yes yes!
1:56 - Devo hits Adrien on the break like he thought Jeffrey was a woman. AWFUL no -call. He was right in Mike Donato's grill and NOTHING.
1:23 - MR ROBINSON'S NEIGHBORHOOD! 80-76 as Stanley nails a three
1:06 - Raftery: "A lot of intestinal fortitude from-both-clubs!"
0:37- another terrible possession that ends in AJ chucking something a mile in the air. Not good. Very un-Uconn like the way our crunch time plays have run tonight.
-consider me petrified with a one point lead and Cuse ball...
0:15- great look by Cuse with Rautins straight on. Good contest by Stanley, got the board, but got fouled and he cant shoot....not out of the woods yet. Stanley 1of2
0:5 - tied game...
AHHHHHHH awful look by Kemba- use your speed to get to the hole! christ!
Double OT
5:00 - by the way, are you fucking kidding me with this game...?!!?
-Last double OT'er i remember was that Brandin Knight game i mentioned earlier
-Doesnt fatigue have to catch up with the Cuse on the second night.
4:09 - terrible foul by Adrien. Concede the basket and move on. Idiot
-everyone on the floor for UCOnn has 4 fouls except Kemba....Oyyyy
3:33 - Harris misses easy breakaway layup. He must be high on crack...
3:11 - Gavin sucks.
2:40 - AJ makes one, 84-83
1:58 - Donato with what I admit is a bad call on Devo. That's a no call. I heard the whistle and thought it was on Craig...He makes both free throws, 86-83
1:43 - Jeffrey with bitch ass foul on Flynn. 86-86
1:18 - Onauku fouls out - Thabeet makes 1of2 - 87-86
0:57 - stupid reach foul on Austrie. Not thinking. 1of2, 87's
3OT
-are you fucking kidding me???
-that Arby's commercial totally just kicked my munchies into full gear...
4:37 - AJ motherfuckin Price - 90-87
3:49 - Thabeet at the line, makes 1of2 - ya gotta try to win this game in the first two-three minutes - everyone is so tired its possible. 91-87
3:!2 - the Price is Right! 93-87. Thats almost like a three possession game. Legs are so tired at this point that it's gonna be very hard to make long shots.
2:59 - Stanley fouls out. I saw a walk on Rautins, and a turnover, but not a foul. Im not sure about that. Great night for Stanley though. He was the only guy on the floor who outplayed Raftery, who had a great game. 2of2 93-89
2:54 - AHHH my god! Awful job by Kemba. Turnover on the press and foul on Jeffrey (4). So no clock and its 93-91.
2:53 - Instant Karma's gonna get you, its gonna knock you right off your feet. Devo tick tack on AJ. 2of2 -95-91
2:39 - Rautins can have that long three for the rest of the game...
2:03 - Jeffrey on the put back 97-91
1:37 - great body control by Thabeet on the drive by Harris. Ill give those two points. 97-93
1:00 - Jeff chokes the ball away, easy breakaway dunk for Harris. 97-95. Harris walked, but were in MSG so NBA rules apply. Five steps for everybody!
0:53 - Jeffrey at the line - 0of2 but Kemba get the board - he has had some HUGE offensive boards tonight.
0:25 - Craig misses a three, but gets his own board! out to AJ and he's fouled
0:21 - NO NO NO - AJ misses first FT....makes second
-Rautins drains a long three and UCONN decides to run more horrible last second offense. Long three by AJ and OT here we go again
4OT -
Seriously though...what the fuck
4:24 - with four himself Thabeet draws the charge on Jackson, thats five, SEE ya!
3:51 - Thabeet throws the crackhead out of the way, thats 5 on him. At least we have more depth..???... 17, 14, 6 in 53 minutes
-Harris ties the game at the line, 100's
3:30 - AJ is a killer...102-100
3:12 - No thabeet and the middle is wide open... 102's
2:50 - Kemba's three just looked like one of my shots. lots of glass, no good
0:38 - how did johnny flynn miss that?? 104's, uconn ball. lets see if we can run something other than a last second deep three...
0:00 - hahahahaha ohhh man, lets just call it a tie.
5OT - first of the year in NCAA
-we have big trouble without Thabeet. I thought AJ made the floater. How in the hell did Harris miss those. And great great great no call by the Refs. just tremendous.
3:20 - AJ makes the jumper 106-104 Raftery: "He's got legs, hes got ONIONS!"
2:01 - Devo fouls out reaching on AJ. He walks over to the bench and punches the water girl in the face. Cuse replace him with a walk-on. Watch, He'll proly make the game winner now...
-AJ 2of2 from line , 108-104
1:40 - Craig lays out a red carpet for Flynn. 108-106
-Commercial for Snickers. Never seen it before. Patrick Ewing dunks on a guy, his nickname is "Patrick Chewing" - which i believe was also his nickname in the court documents from the Gold Club case.
0:59 - Gavin fouls out - Flynn at the line with 2 to tie. Scottie Haralson back in.
Flynn 2of2 - 108's - 6OT anyone??
SCOTTIE HARALSON!!!! 110-108
0:20 ahhhhh no he picks up the foul on Flynn. They are still playing Flynn the same way off the high screen, funneling him to the hoop...excpet Thabeet isn't there anymore! gahhhh - 2of2 - 110's
0:15 - Time, Uconn - get to the hole!
noooooooo come on, another horrible shot by AJ from three. you have no legs, youve played like two games, everyone is in foul trouble. drive the fucking ball. again and again and again- im losing my mind watching this.
6 OT
-I hope you had the over....
this game is going to be decided by walk-ons. Jimmy Veronick posting up Justin Thomas, just watch.
4:50 - how does andy rautins do it? 110-113
2:34 - game. fuck. Harris got Singler'ed by the rim, got it back and got fouled. Not good. 118-112
2:!4- George Blaney jsut picked his nose.
0:00 - Im bummed, but i feel terrible for the team. this is gonna be tough to come back from. if we get through the second round ill be pretty pleased. they never stopped playing hard
-cuse was 24of28 from FT in OT crazy
Post-Game
-Next week = San Diego 2.0 anyone? I'm so disgusted right now, particularly because I think we played pretty damn well, and still lost. It ceased to even be a game after the second OT - it just became a war of attrition through fouls.
What's most saddening is the big picture on this year. I mean it's almost worse than 2006 because these kids are so easy to like. Just a great team of great players and this is what we get. And all these North Carolina doppelgangers talk about how good they could be if they had Zoeller and Ginyard all year. They all conveniently forget that we could be trotting out Nate Miles (zone killing shooter we've missed since Rashad), Majok (Jimmy says he'd be playing 20-25minutes), and The Chuckwagon (supposedly playing much better since going academically ineligible). Oh, and Jerome dyson. Just a terribly upsetting game and you get the feeling that it's going to be that kind of postseason.
Oh, and the worst part - now you wont be able to turn on the TV all day tomorrow without seeing clips of this game.
But- at least we padded our block total. so we can still recruit big men with that nice stat.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Providence/DePaul Postgame
The Bob Knight Old Curmudgeon Rant of the Day:
A really closely played game, yet each team blew an easy transition bucket by throwing lousy alley-oops. Put the ball on the floor for christsakes! (scream like Herm Edwrds): Hello, you play to win the game!
-Jerry Wainwright aka The Principal from Breakfast Club aka Droopy Dog
-Liked to see Keno Davis get that T for arguing an out-of-bounds call, that did look a little suspect, with Providence down 59-55. Very Calhoun-esque. He even kept yelling at the ref after DePaul shot their free throws and a timeout was called. Ballsy for a first year Big East coach against veteran refs.
-My thoughts at halftime: Hey Providence, you're not in the Dunkin' Donuts Center anymore. And God Shamgod isn't walking through that door...
-DePaul totally blew it from 4:44 to 4:00. They took three awful three pointers, all of which turned into Providence baskets. Oh yeah, and they didn't score a FG from 11:00 until 2:00.
-Huge comeback, not deficit wise, but Providence totally played like shit for 30 minutes and DePaul was on fire. No word on whether Jeff Xavier's brother ran on the court to celebrate. We have a call in to his parole officer to see if post-game on court celebrations are permitted.
-Worst part of the Providence comeback: I had totally written off any chance of Providence covering (-9.5), and then they got it to 10 points with 22 seconds to play only for Will Walker to make a three from somewhere in the fifth fucking row and Providence makes two free throws to win by 9. I hate it. Emotionally detached, then very alive again, and then dead. it's like losing two bets in the same game.
A really closely played game, yet each team blew an easy transition bucket by throwing lousy alley-oops. Put the ball on the floor for christsakes! (scream like Herm Edwrds): Hello, you play to win the game!
-Jerry Wainwright aka The Principal from Breakfast Club aka Droopy Dog
-Liked to see Keno Davis get that T for arguing an out-of-bounds call, that did look a little suspect, with Providence down 59-55. Very Calhoun-esque. He even kept yelling at the ref after DePaul shot their free throws and a timeout was called. Ballsy for a first year Big East coach against veteran refs.
-My thoughts at halftime: Hey Providence, you're not in the Dunkin' Donuts Center anymore. And God Shamgod isn't walking through that door...
-DePaul totally blew it from 4:44 to 4:00. They took three awful three pointers, all of which turned into Providence baskets. Oh yeah, and they didn't score a FG from 11:00 until 2:00.
-Huge comeback, not deficit wise, but Providence totally played like shit for 30 minutes and DePaul was on fire. No word on whether Jeff Xavier's brother ran on the court to celebrate. We have a call in to his parole officer to see if post-game on court celebrations are permitted.
-Worst part of the Providence comeback: I had totally written off any chance of Providence covering (-9.5), and then they got it to 10 points with 22 seconds to play only for Will Walker to make a three from somewhere in the fifth fucking row and Providence makes two free throws to win by 9. I hate it. Emotionally detached, then very alive again, and then dead. it's like losing two bets in the same game.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Foot and Balls Disease (that's a cloven-foot animal joke)
So, yesterday Ed Davis dunked all over Brian Zoubek, who attempted to take a charge (very white of him) and in doing so fell to the ground. When Davis got done hanging from the rim his foot landed square on the area where Zoubek's balls should be. However, Zoubek's reaction wasn't equal to the pain that should have resulted, confirming my ongoing suspicion that Brian Zoubek has a vagina. It would certainly explain his particularly weak post play and overt showings of emotion. YouTube doesn't have the video of this play posted, because coach k censors it (see: singler getting stuffed by the rim and lance thomas slapping jon scheyer in the head). luckily these kids did a wonderful re-enactment, complete with 1960's Batman type exclamation at the end. Really fantastic stuff
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Well Played
After yesterday's tough loss to Pitt, I figured we could use some good news. Thankfully the Big East complied, releasing the All-Conference Teams.
First Team: Hasheem Thabeet
Second Team: AJ Price
Third Team: Jeff Adrien
All-Freshman Team: Kemba Walker
Too bad that three of those four players will be gone after this season...
First Team: Hasheem Thabeet
Second Team: AJ Price
Third Team: Jeff Adrien
All-Freshman Team: Kemba Walker
Too bad that three of those four players will be gone after this season...
Dunk of the Year
With the college basketball regular season coming to an end today I couldn't resist the chance to post this DeQuan Jones dunk again.
Friday, March 6, 2009
Skip's Beer Pong and Uconn basketball
Skip's Beer Pong, www.skipsbeerpong.com hosted it's first party Wednesday night at Ted's. The giveaway was a Port-O-Pong, which is a floating beer pong device for pool or pond use - pond would be good for you - which everyone could buy $1 raffle tickets for. Seems fair enough, ey? Well, not fair enough for Gavin Edwards. Edwards repeatedly refused to purchase a ticket and instead asked for a free one, saying he didn't have a dollar. This defiance angered a drunken KJ, who demanded that "as a scholarship athlete you get to go to school for free. Now help me pay my goddamn tuition!" This led to a string of expletives directed at Edwards after Jim Nantz popped up out of nowhere and mentioned that, "you know, his father Earl played in the NFL."
Normally we are a little tough on womens basketball here at the dotcom. However, lots of respect to the lady Huskies Meghan Gardler. She bought a whopping 5 tickets, and that karma served her well, as she won the raffle. Conspiracy theorists like myself are positing that the raffle was rigged due to the close relationship between KJ and Geno. Glad to see Meghan win the Port-o-pong, after all - who wouldn't want to get wet with the lovely Gardler?? Furthermore, her profile on the Uconn Website describes her as, "..a great ball-handler." giddy up!
Normally we are a little tough on womens basketball here at the dotcom. However, lots of respect to the lady Huskies Meghan Gardler. She bought a whopping 5 tickets, and that karma served her well, as she won the raffle. Conspiracy theorists like myself are positing that the raffle was rigged due to the close relationship between KJ and Geno. Glad to see Meghan win the Port-o-pong, after all - who wouldn't want to get wet with the lovely Gardler?? Furthermore, her profile on the Uconn Website describes her as, "..a great ball-handler." giddy up!
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Craig Austrie disappoints me again
Via Mike Anthony, Hartford Courant
Austrie said yesterday that his he and his girlfriend of three years, Heather Coombs, will get married July 10, 2010. Coombs is a former basketball player at Southern Connecticut State University.
So let me get this right...Craig decided to spend his years as a starter (largely) at a national powerhouse with the same girl. From another school. For three years. That is the whitest thing I've ever heard. Even if Heather Coombs is a fox, and she played ball at SCSU - so she's most assuredly not, this saddens me. Seriously, if he hasn't had like one hundred affairs, I'm gonna be really disappointed. It's almost hard to root for him now. This is a disgrace to the "do you know who i am?" line that I've always longed to be able to use.
3/7.09 Note: apparently Heather Coombs is indeed a fox. I have seen some facebook pictures since originally posting this. Nice work by Craig, but i still think he should have been taking better advantage of being the starting point guard at UConn.
Austrie said yesterday that his he and his girlfriend of three years, Heather Coombs, will get married July 10, 2010. Coombs is a former basketball player at Southern Connecticut State University.
So let me get this right...Craig decided to spend his years as a starter (largely) at a national powerhouse with the same girl. From another school. For three years. That is the whitest thing I've ever heard. Even if Heather Coombs is a fox, and she played ball at SCSU - so she's most assuredly not, this saddens me. Seriously, if he hasn't had like one hundred affairs, I'm gonna be really disappointed. It's almost hard to root for him now. This is a disgrace to the "do you know who i am?" line that I've always longed to be able to use.
3/7.09 Note: apparently Heather Coombs is indeed a fox. I have seen some facebook pictures since originally posting this. Nice work by Craig, but i still think he should have been taking better advantage of being the starting point guard at UConn.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Bro ken ankles
AJ Price: "...they didn't do a good job of playing the ball screen all game. I actually felt disrespected. They continually went under the screen time and time again, even after I even got off to a good start. At first, I was just going to take McNeal 1-on-1 but I said to myself, 'I can probably get a good shot.'"
Efforts like the Marquette game make you think UConn can again be the best team in the nation. Problem is, it's difficult to get all the ingredients together on the same night. AJ was amazing, Stanley played to his potential for the first time since the Maine game last season, shit - even Scottie Haralson contributed. If all that happens consistently, then UConn is the team to beat.
Efforts like the Marquette game make you think UConn can again be the best team in the nation. Problem is, it's difficult to get all the ingredients together on the same night. AJ was amazing, Stanley played to his potential for the first time since the Maine game last season, shit - even Scottie Haralson contributed. If all that happens consistently, then UConn is the team to beat.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
799 and counting
The win over South Florida leaves Jimmy just one away from 800 career wins. Here's a little treat in his honor as they go to Marquette tonight...
Monday, February 23, 2009
How many steps!?!?!
Kudos to Bob Knight for talking about the traveling problem in college basketball all season. He would never mention this example because the offender plays for Knight's beloved Coach K, so thanks to the good folks at Deadspin for bringing this one to my attention. Beware: the slo-mo will have you dissecting this clip like the Zapruder film for a good 20 minutes trying to figure if he takes 11, 12, or 13 steps without dribbling the ball.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Show me the money!
Yesterday Ken Krayeske felt that Jim Calhoun's 1.6 mil salary was way out of line. And after researching what some D1 coaches make at other public universities, I agree that his salary is nuts. Dude deserves a fucking RAISE! Take a look at where he ranks and tell me otherwise. (Oh, and so we get all our facts right, here is an interactive map containing state budget deficits)
-Billy Donovan (Florida): 3.5 mil
-Bill Self (Kansas): 3 mil
-Thad Matta (Ohio State): 2.5 mil
-John Calipari (Memphis): 2.35 mil
-Billy Gillespie (Kentucky): 2.3 mil
-Bruce Pearl (Tennessee): 2.3 mil
-Rick Pitino (Louisville): 2.25 mil
-Roy Williams (North Carolina): 2.11 mil
-Rick Barnes (Texas): 2 mil
-Bob Huggins (West Virginia): 2 mil
-Ben Howland (UCLA): 1.97 mil
-Tubby Smith (Minnesota): 1.75 mil
-Tom Izzo (Michigan State): 1.7 mil
-Tom Crean (Indiana): 1.6+ mil
-Gary Williams (Maryland): 1.6 mil
After seeing that list, there's only one thing Jimmy C. can ask for...
-Billy Donovan (Florida): 3.5 mil
-Bill Self (Kansas): 3 mil
-Thad Matta (Ohio State): 2.5 mil
-John Calipari (Memphis): 2.35 mil
-Billy Gillespie (Kentucky): 2.3 mil
-Bruce Pearl (Tennessee): 2.3 mil
-Rick Pitino (Louisville): 2.25 mil
-Roy Williams (North Carolina): 2.11 mil
-Rick Barnes (Texas): 2 mil
-Bob Huggins (West Virginia): 2 mil
-Ben Howland (UCLA): 1.97 mil
-Tubby Smith (Minnesota): 1.75 mil
-Tom Izzo (Michigan State): 1.7 mil
-Tom Crean (Indiana): 1.6+ mil
-Gary Williams (Maryland): 1.6 mil
After seeing that list, there's only one thing Jimmy C. can ask for...
Saturday, February 21, 2009
You Can't Handle the Truth!
While this afternoon's 64-50 win over South Florida was pretty boring, the press conference apparently wasn't (then again, is a Jimmy C. presser ever boring?).
Mike Anthony, Hartford Courant
HARTFORD, Conn. -- Connecticut coach Jim Calhoun got into a heated exchange at a postgame news conference Saturday with a freelance journalist and political activist who questioned why the coach of a public university was making $1.6 million in tough economic times.
"Not a dime back," Calhoun joked as Ken Krayeske asked about Calhoun's salary and the state's budget deficit, which is estimated at $944 million for the current fiscal year and up to $8 billion over the next two years.
When Krayeske continued the line of questioning, Calhoun got angry.
"My best advice to you is, shut up," said Calhoun, who offered to talk to Krayeske after the news conference that followed the top-ranked Huskies' 64-50 victory over South Florida.
Just when you thought the folks here at 77-74dotcom wouldn't hook you up with the video...ENJOY! And in the words of Jimmy C, "You're Welcome!"
Mike Anthony, Hartford Courant
HARTFORD, Conn. -- Connecticut coach Jim Calhoun got into a heated exchange at a postgame news conference Saturday with a freelance journalist and political activist who questioned why the coach of a public university was making $1.6 million in tough economic times.
"Not a dime back," Calhoun joked as Ken Krayeske asked about Calhoun's salary and the state's budget deficit, which is estimated at $944 million for the current fiscal year and up to $8 billion over the next two years.
When Krayeske continued the line of questioning, Calhoun got angry.
"My best advice to you is, shut up," said Calhoun, who offered to talk to Krayeske after the news conference that followed the top-ranked Huskies' 64-50 victory over South Florida.
Just when you thought the folks here at 77-74dotcom wouldn't hook you up with the video...ENJOY! And in the words of Jimmy C, "You're Welcome!"
26, 13, 6, and 1 choke out
Although the Bucks lost to the Cleveland LeBron's and his 55 pts last night, Charlie Villanueva had himself a big 3 1/2 quarters: 26 pts, 13 boards, 6 assists, a take down and one choke out. Check out the video kids as evidence why you never ask Charlie who his barber is.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
AJ Fined or something
From Mike Anthony - Hartford Courant
UConn basketball player A.J. Price appeared at Superior Court in Rockville on Wednesday to face three motor vehicle violations and was given a continuance to next Wednesday.
Price, 22, of Amityville, N.Y., was pulled over by Coventry police Jan. 25 at 2:39 a.m. and charged with speeding, operating a motor vehicle with a suspended license and failure to carry registration. Operating a motor vehicle with a suspended license is a misdemeanor.
He was stopped while driving back to campus after UConn arrived home from a 69-61 win at Notre Dame Jan. 24.
So let me get this right. UConn gets it's biggest win of the season on national t.v. and hours later some Coventry cop pulls over AJ motherfuckin' Price? What kind of communist does something like that...i would say he must be a Notre Dame grad trying to exact some kind of revenge BUT he's a Coventry cop. So he probably didn't graduate from anything other than a GED program - HEYooooo
UConn basketball player A.J. Price appeared at Superior Court in Rockville on Wednesday to face three motor vehicle violations and was given a continuance to next Wednesday.
Price, 22, of Amityville, N.Y., was pulled over by Coventry police Jan. 25 at 2:39 a.m. and charged with speeding, operating a motor vehicle with a suspended license and failure to carry registration. Operating a motor vehicle with a suspended license is a misdemeanor.
He was stopped while driving back to campus after UConn arrived home from a 69-61 win at Notre Dame Jan. 24.
So let me get this right. UConn gets it's biggest win of the season on national t.v. and hours later some Coventry cop pulls over AJ motherfuckin' Price? What kind of communist does something like that...i would say he must be a Notre Dame grad trying to exact some kind of revenge BUT he's a Coventry cop. So he probably didn't graduate from anything other than a GED program - HEYooooo
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Caron to Cleveland?
ESPN is reporting that the Cleveland LeBrons are in trade talks with the Wizards about Caron Butler and Antwain Jamison. Even though this would mean instant death for my already seemingly overmatched Celtics, I hope it happens. Caron is a winner and deserves to play for one. He wants to, "...be a winner, not a chicken dinner."
I don't think it happens- the trade would be tantamount to Washington giving up on their fans, although I suppose it can't get much worse, as the deal would include Wally's terrible contract (albeit expiring). It's kinda stupid to sign an injured player to a $111m contract and then trade away a fan favorite. Anyway, good luck Caron. You deserve a championship - even if it is at the expense of my C's.
Below, a clip to remind us why we loved Tuff Juice
I don't think it happens- the trade would be tantamount to Washington giving up on their fans, although I suppose it can't get much worse, as the deal would include Wally's terrible contract (albeit expiring). It's kinda stupid to sign an injured player to a $111m contract and then trade away a fan favorite. Anyway, good luck Caron. You deserve a championship - even if it is at the expense of my C's.
Below, a clip to remind us why we loved Tuff Juice
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